Jim Van Gelderen: Okay, the book of Exodus, if you have your Bibles, Exodus 21, and I want to preach this morning, or this afternoon, I'm going to get it wrong, I never preach in the morning, hardly ever, I should say, I guess I do, chapel that is, but I'm so used to saying this morning, but anyway, so let's go to Exodus chapter 21, and we're going to be looking at a message I've entitled, God's Three Death Sentences for Disrespecting Parents.

God's Three Death Sentences for disrespecting parents. What if I told you that if you lived in the Old Testament, most of you would be dead? The truth is, that's the truth.

Most of you do things on a regular basis that in the Old Testament would have gotten you executed. And I want you to understand this morning that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. We do not live in a theocracy.

Do you know what a theocracy is, that's when God ruled. The only theocracy there really was, was Old Testament Israel, but the Bible tells us there will never be another theocracy until the millennial reign of Christ. I am not recommending that we bring in the kingdom.

That's not the purpose of the message. The purpose of the message is this. Because of God giving us an example of theocracy in the Old Testament, we can have an idea about how God thinks.

Do you know you can understand a lot about a culture by its laws and its consequences, penal code, I guess we could say, the penalties you get because of certain crimes. And in the United States, there are only two things that will get you executed. Most of us know one of them, and that's murder.

But there's another one that has never occurred in your lifetime, and it hasn't occurred in my lifetime, but not in yours, and that is treason against the United States. It's 1963. The Rosenbergs sold nuclear secrets to the Soviet Union and were executed in 1963.

By the way, they brought a lot of problems into our world because of their selfishness. Okay, so the Rosenbergs were the last people that were executed for treason. But that tells us something about American culture.

American culture, though it's obviously been liberalized in certain states, the truth is we all know that there are still many people who believe the death penalty for murder is appropriate. You take a life, your life's going to be taken. Okay, so we understand a little bit about American culture by simply what we require the death penalty for.

It gives you an idea of culture. Now, to help us understand the mind of God, do you know that in the Old Testament, there were several things that could get you executed? How about this one?

Suffer not a witch to live. Do you know that in the Old Testament, if a person was into witchcraft or Satanism, they were executed? I wonder how Harry Potter would have gone over in Old Testament Israel.

I don't think it would have been very popular. You know why? Because God would have executed him.

Yeah. In other words, God has no toleration for anything that's demonic, and you shouldn't either. You shouldn't watch movies that glorify wizards and witches and white magic or dark magic or anything with the occult.

Why? Because God had a very strict code about those that were involved in that. They were supposed to be executed.

Old Testament Israel. That helps us understand the mind of God, doesn't it? How about this?

Whosoever committeth adultery with a woman, the Bible says the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death. So we know that God had no toleration for adultery in the Old Testament. And we could go through and talk about kidnapping would cause a person to face the death penalty.

So there are several things in the Old Testament. I'm not going to go through them all because I probably wouldn't know them all, but there are several things in the Old Testament that would get you executed. But what does that teach us about God?

It teaches us about God. There are certain things God says don't tolerate them. Now, if they shouldn't be tolerated in Old Testament Israel, I'm pretty sure they shouldn't be tolerated in your life.

What do you think? Now, what do you think if you had a friend and you went to school with them, high school, you got a lot of friends in high school. Ten years from now, let's imagine you pick up the newspaper, and all of a sudden you see his face in the newspaper.

I don't know if this has ever happened to you. It has to me. You see the face of somebody that you know in the newspaper.

I remember I saw Fox News probably about ten years ago, maybe eight, I can't remember. And right there was a picture of a pastor that I knew, and he murdered somebody.

And he's in prison at this very moment. Okay, it's kind of stunning, isn't it? So let's imagine you pick up the newspaper, and you see a picture of your friend and you find out that your friend was a mass murderer.

I mean, murdered a bunch of people. And so let's imagine that eventually, you know, he's tried, put in prison and you decide to go visit him. And so you go, you know how it is.

They sit, maybe you don't because you haven't done this yet. They sit on the other side of the glass. You're on one side, you got the telephone, you talk.

And you're saying, man, what gives? How did you become a mass murderer? And your friend goes, oh, I don't know.

I just got this little problem. I just get this urge and I want to knock people off. You think, man, something's wrong with him.

Why? Because he doesn't take it seriously. This is a serious crime.

You're going to spend the rest of your life in prison. It's a big deal, right? But here's how most teenagers, yeah, I treat my parents like trash, no big deal.

Oh, really? Because in the Old Testament, it would have gotten you executed, which means it's a big deal to God.

And it ought to be a big deal to you, how you treat your parents. Well, you say my parents aren't perfect. Well, I got really good news for you.

No parents are perfect. And I will tell you this, friends. I know some people come from difficult parent situations.

I get all that. But the answer is never disrespect. It's never disrespect.

Okay, so let's look at God's three death sentences for disrespecting parents. Now, I want to encourage you something, young person. This is one of those issues that God attaches the length of your life to.

In other words, if you want to live a long, healthy life here, on planet Earth, God says there's something you need to do, and there's something you need to not do, and it's all related to your parents.

I remember years ago, Oliver B. Greene, who was a radio preacher, a great radio preacher, and I've listened to many of his sermons, particularly his tent meeting sermons, which aren't as famous as his radio broadcasts, but Oliver Greene was particularly popular in the South.

He died in his 60s. It's pretty young, isn't it? His brother, Jack Greene, lived till his 90s.

So what was the difference? Well, Oliver Greene would have told you what the difference was. He told on the radio program from time to time, he said, by the way, I'll not live a full life.

He said, the reason I will not live a full life is because the way I treated my parents before I got saved. He said, I will not live a full life. And he didn't.

His brother Jack beat him by 30 years. Both preachers. Oliver was far more well-known than Jack Greene.

But nonetheless, 30 years difference. So we're going to see in a moment how you treat your parents and your attitude toward your parents ties. God ties it to the length of life.

Now, we'll deal, first of all, with the negative part, what God says will shorten your life. And, of course, the Bible clearly says, honor thy father and mother, which is the first commandment, with promise, that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. So that one's kind of obvious.

Anytime people say, you honor your parents, you live long. But you say, well, preacher doesn't say if you dishonor your parents, your life will be cut short. And the answer to that would be, I don't think you're right.

I think you're going to see some nuances, clear nuances in the Old Testament that disrespecting your parents affects length of life. Now, I know this is kind of a stirring message. I mean, it kind of goes where it's a little uncomfortable but the way you treat your parents is important.

Do you roll your eyes at your parents? You wouldn't be here if you lived in Old Testament Israel. Do you talk back to your parents?

You wouldn't be here if you lived in Old Testament Israel. You call them the old man, the old lady behind their back, you wouldn't be here if you lived in Old Testament Israel. Are you constantly sneaking behind their backs, watching stuff you shouldn't watch, doing things you shouldn't do, hanging out with people they don't want you to hang out?

You wouldn't be alive if you lived in Old Testament Israel, and I'm going to prove it from the Old Testament. So let's look at God's three death sentences for disrespecting parents. Okay, Exodus chapter number 21.

And by the way, I probably ought to say this before we dive into it. If you ever never learned me preaching, I love my introductions. I don't do much with the messages, but I love introductions.

Okay. But anyway, so we're still in the introduction. Okay.

But anyway, yeah, I remember when I was growing up, I loved cartoons. I still do. Animation, I just love.

I don't know why, but I just love animation. And when I was growing up, I was in the golden era of animation. I feel sorry for all of you.

You know why?

You have never experienced Saturday morning cartoons.

And as a result of that you have never experienced eating sugar cereal to your guts full. You know what I'm talking about. You don't.

You have no idea what I'm talking about. You have missed out on life. Okay but anyway.

I love how many of you old people back here remember Saturday morning cartoons. Yeah see they're all heathens like me. Okay but yeah we love Saturday morning cartoons.

And I just fell in love with animation. And I've got a friend who works for an animator. And and he talks animation.

He knows it better than I do. We talk about the development and the evolution if I use that word a good way of animation.

But something happened in the 1980s that had never happened in animation history. A cartoon was made, and the target audience was not young people, was not kids. Most cartoons, the target audience was kids.

In fact, all of them were until the 1980s. And they made a cartoon in the late 1980s that was designed for adults. The problem is it became very popular with everybody, kids and teenagers, and it's unfortunately still with us today.

The cartoon is called The Simpsons. And in 1989, Time Magazine, lest I checked, it was not an independent Baptist fundamental publication, but in 1989, Time Magazine wrote this article on The Simpsons. Quote, TV family from hell.

You know, sometimes lost people have more sense than saved people. If Bart Simpson was a real kid and lived in Old Testament Israel, he would have been executed before the first episode was over.

That's how strong the Bible is. Our world has so dumbed down respecting your parents that most of you kids just feel like, well, just expected. We're teenagers, so we can roll our eyes at our parents.

We can disobey them behind their back. We can smart off to them in their presence, right? You think that because that's what culture does, and culture okays it.

But I'm telling you friends. Culture culture can change. But God's word does not change.

Now let's get to this message because some of you are going to need to get right with your parents. And you're going to need to say mom and dad if I lived in Old Testament Israel I'd have been executed. And I've been treating in a way that God has no toleration for.

And I've tolerated what God did not tolerate. And you need to take God's side on the deal against yourself. Now first of all let's look at the very first one, Exodus chapter 21, look at verse number 15.

And he that smiteth his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. Now friends, that would just simply say death for smiting. Now the word smite has the idea of to strike, and the definition in the Strong's Concordance is to strike, parentheses, literally or figuratively.

I would assume 99% of you have never literally struck your parents. But maybe some of you have come close. Maybe you've pushed them.

Maybe you've made physical contact to show your displeasure. But it also says figuratively. You know what figuratively means?

You may have never laid a hand on them. You may have never touched them in a way to show your displeasure, but you've treated them a way. Don't miss this.

Why does somebody strike somebody or smite somebody? You want to hurt them. So figuratively, you know what that means?

You do things because you want to hurt them. Have you ever given your parents a silent treatment? I'm not trying to be unkind.

I'm just telling you you're in verse 15. Because you know what the silent treatment is designed for? Yeah, they do that to me.

I'll show them. I won't say anything. Some of you cannot even get the word yes and no out when your parents talk to you.

You just grunt. I'm not just trying to be unkind. I'm just telling you you're in verse 15.

Because you're doing something. You're trying to strike back at your parents by clamming up, Give them the silent treatment, not talking to them about anything, and you're trying to hurt them. You're trying to get back at them.

You say, well, they hurt me. Well, hurting them is not the answer. God says, death for smiting.

So anytime you say something or do something that is intended to hurt them, have you ever said something that you meant to hurt them?

I'm talking to some of you who say things like, man, I wish I wasn't born in this house. I wish you weren't my mother and father. I've even heard I-H-A-T-E.

I hate to even say that word, you know. Yeah, you. Some of you have said that to your parents.

I'm not trying to be unkind. I'm just saying you're in verse number 15. And in the Old Testament, you wouldn't be here.

You need to go back and say, I was wrong. So death for smiting. In other words, it's things that you do or say that are intended to inflict pain in your parents' heart, not just physical pain.

That's nothing compared to the emotional pain. Now, some of you kids out here are shocked and saying, do kids actually do that? I hate to tell you they do, but don't be influenced by them.

Okay, it's like this. Then let's go look at verse 17, because if that doesn't get you, 17 is a lot tougher. Okay, verse number 17.

And he that curseth his father or his mother shall surely be put to death. Okay, this is death for cursing. You say, well, pretty sure, I've never cussed out my parents.

I've never said curse words to my parents. Well, I want to tell you something about the Hebrew concept. You can learn, again, like we said, you can learn a lot about a culture by what it requires the death penalty for, but you can also learn a lot about a culture by their language.

Like, for instance, we used to have a couple students from Ghana, West Africa, Aquila. Some of you remember Aquila. Aquila came here, and the very first time it snowed, he called back to Ghana.

He was so amazed. Because in Ghana, they have no word for snow. You know why?

Because it doesn't snow. And so in the translation of the Old Testament, they say not white as snow because there's no word. They say white as wool.

And so he called back to Ghana, and here's what he said to his Ghana friends. Wool is not white. Snow is.

You see, we learn a lot about a culture just by its language. Do you know in English we have the one word curse? But in Hebrew, there are five Hebrew words translated our one English word curse.

So the concept of cursing is very nuanced in Hebrew culture. This particular word curse, according to the theological word book of the Old Testament, means to be light or to be slight. Really, fortunately, we have in the English language this particular mechanism.

We say, don't treat somebody lightly. That's the idea. So cursing is treating somebody lightly.

Now, the opposite, the word honor, it's very interesting, in the Old Testament, means to treat weightily. It's the word kabod, the Hebrew word kabod, and it has the idea of weight. Treating someone weightily.

Now, we don't use that. In fact, if we use that in English, people would be offended by it. You know what I'm saying?

I'm gonna treat you weightily, okay? That's probably not gonna go over well. Okay, but that's the idea.

It's treating them, I would put it this way, it's treating somebody like they're a heavyweight. Now, I'm gonna just be honest with you, most of you won't remember this, but I don't have a lot of respect for Mike Tyson. Now, don't get me wrong.

Mike Tyson was a great boxer, but Mike Tyson in recent years has done several things. Even in his career, he did several things that makes you lose respect for him. Recently, I'd say a few years ago, he got in a fight on an airplane, okay?

That's Mike Tyson, and he's famous for biting Evander Holyfield's ear during a match, okay? And so Mike Tyson is kind of known for the wrong things. He's a great boxer, but he has a lack of self-control.

He has an anger problem, and okay, But if Mike Tyson of boxing fame walked into this auditorium, I'm not treating him disrespectfully. I'm not walking up to Mike Tyson, putting my finger in his chest bone. Okay, Mike, you and me outside.

Let's settle it up. You and me. I'm not doing that.

You know, Mike's one of those people that can leave a lasting impression on your face. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah.

You got a dimple, he'll get rid of it. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah.

You want some knuckle marks on your cheekbone? Yeah, they'll be there. Okay, yeah.

I'm telling you, I would treat him with great respect. I don't respect him. But I would treat him with respect.

I would treat him weightily. Why? He's a heavyweight.

You get the idea of what? You say, well, preacher, I don't respect this about my dad. I don't respect this about…

You may be right. But God says, okay, treat them like they're a heavyweight. Are you seeing the point?

In fact, Jesus in the New Testament twice makes this distinction. Honor thy father and mother and whoso curseth his father and mother, let him die the death. Jesus makes the distinction that the opposite of honoring is cursing and the opposite of cursing is honoring.

Now that makes sense in the Hebrew because honoring is treating weightily and cursing is treating lightly.

So when you curse your father and mother, God says let them die of the deaths. What does that mean? It means to treat them lightly.

In other words, you treat them like they're not your parents. You treat them like a peer. Can I tell you this about your parents?

They're not your peer. They're not like your siblings.

God says to treat them with a respect and weight that is due their position. And God says that he's very clear about that. He says let him the curse of his father and mother let him die the death.

There in the New Testament Mark 7 10 and Matthew 15 4. Who those of you like to see that distinction in the New Testament which comes out of the Old Testament. And Jesus of course re-emphasized this.

And of course Ephesians honor thy father and mother that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth. So we clearly see that here. But let's get back to cursing because cursing we think of as the mouth.

But you can actually do it and never open your mouth. You know where we find that?

Proverbs 30, 17 the eye that mocketh at his father and the eye that despiseth to obey his mother. The ravens of the valley shall pick it out and the young eagles shall eat it. Now that's an interesting verse.

Now that has nuances of untimely death. Now in order to understand that verse fully you have to understand hebrew culture. In hebrew culture it's a little bit stepped up from american culture.

But in hebrew culture they really do value the body. And when a person dies how they're treated after their death is really important. Do you remember what rizpah did when her sons were hung up before the Lord evidently for their complicity in the killing of the Gibeonites.

She stayed out there for weeks and months driving away the birds of prey and driving away the beasts of the field who were coming to devour the corpses of her sons, the rotting corpses of her sons. And she stayed out there. Why?

Because it was unthinkable to a Jewish mother that her son's bodies would be eaten by the beasts of the field and the birds of prey. It was unthinkable to her. What are the men of Jabesh-gilead do when Saul's body was nailed to the wall.

They risked their lives to rescue a corpse. See, it's hard for us to totally understand that as Americans. We obviously try to get the fallen and all that in warfare.

We get all that, but not to the degree of the Hebrews. They were big about it. And so when the Bible says, the eye that mocketh at his father and despiseth that his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out and the young eagles shall eat it, is basically something to a Hebrew that is unthinkable.

Now, you may know this, but when a body dies and the birds of prey are circling around, when a body dies, the birds of prey descend. And I hate to tell you this, it's kind of gross, but the very first thing they go for on a corpse is the eye.

So it has nuances of untimely death. There's no doubt about it. So God is trying to warn you with something.

You might be out here and say, well, I'm pretty sure if you honor your parents, you live long. But it doesn't say if you dishonor, you won't live long. Well, let's combine the verse we just talked to with Proverbs 20.

Whoso curseth his father or mother, same word, his lamp shall be put out in obscure darkness. Hebrew scholars tell us that the nuance of that seems to indicate untimely death, untimely death before your time. Well, let's go back to what this means, the eye that mocketh at his father.

Have you ever been around your friends? You know how it is. Maybe even at school or church and you're having a good time with your friends and your dad walks out.

And you think, oh, my dad's so out of it. Yeah, I mean, he doesn't even dress cool. You look at your friends with your eyes.

You kind of roll your eyes like, yeah, I know my dad's not cool. I'm not trying to be unkind. I'm just telling you that's what that verse is talking about.

When you mock your dad with your eyes, that's what it's talking about. And then despise to obey your mother. I'm not trying to be unkind to some of you girls, but some of you do it all the time.

Mom says, wash the dishes. And here's exactly what you do. You despise to obey with your eyes.

Now, God is saying it's a big deal. You're cursing your mother. You say, preacher, I'm not using cuss words, but you're treating her lightly.

You're not treating her with due respect. That's the Old Testament word. And I'm begging some of you young people to get right with your parents.

And don't just get right, start dealing with it. And tell your parents, don't let me get away with it because some of them are afraid to put their foot down because you have reacted so much. You've gotten your way.

Unfortunately, they let you get your way. But you know what you need to do in maturity? You need to get back with your parents and say, I know, I've given you a hard time, but from now on, I'm giving you permission to correct me when I'm being disrespectful.

I don't want to be disrespectful. I'd kind of like to live long on the earth.

Your eye, you cannot even speak and do things that could take your life in the Old Testament. I'm just talking to some of you that absolutely are so immersed in American culture, this is absolutely a foreign concept to you. You're just blown away.

But I'm going to help some of you have nightmares. Okay I'm going to help some of you have nightmares. I want you to imagine one day being a father or mother depending on which gender you are.

I want you to imagine being a father or mother. And I want you to imagine a house full of kids just like you. Some of you won't sleep for three days.

Okay yeah nightmares, horror. Hopefully that wouldn't bother you. You'd think yeah I'd love to have a house full of me.

Some of you wouldn't like to have a house full of you. You know you hassle them give them a hard time. You know what you really need to do.

Learn this friends. God's big enough to work through your parents. And what you need to do is say mom and dad.

Here's the here's what I'd like to do. Here's some factors. Here's this.

But whatever decision you make I'll I'll I'll I'll do whatever you want me to do. I won't give you a hard time. Because some of you hassle until you get your way.

And what God is trying to help you understand is that won't work. That's not going to work. That's that's cursing your parents when you're treating them disrespectfully.

You're treating them lightly. So we see, wow, these are pretty strong, aren't they? Yeah, they're pretty strong.

Well, that brings us, so we see death for smiting, death for cursing or treating them lightly. And that could be a variety of things. And I don't mean to be unkind, but some of you have shortly learned how to pull your parents' string and you know how to get your own way.

And you know how to get them on your side even when you're the one who's done wrong.

And what God is trying to help you understand is that's not the way it goes that's not what God's trying to do what God is not pleased by that which brings us to the final one go to Deuteronomy 21 so we got a third death sentence for disrespecting a third one Deuteronomy 21 Deuteronomy 21 and we'll see our third death sentence for disrespect Deuteronomy 21 this one's a little longer and let's begin in verse number 18.

If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son which will not obey the voice of his father or the voice of his mother and that when they have chastened him will not hearken unto them. Then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him and bring him out unto the elders of his city and under the gate of his place.

And they shall say unto the elders of this city this our son is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey our voice. He is a glutton and a drunkard.

And that's not just talking about overeating. It means he has no self-control. And all the men of the city shall stone with stones that he dies.

So shalt thou put evil away from among you and all Israel shall hear and please tell me the last word and hear. So imagine you're an Old Testament Israel kid, about 16.

And the word comes out in the Jerusalem Journal Sentinel, okay? 16 year old kid executed for sneaking behind his parents back constantly and disobeying.

That kind of, you'd kind of perk up. Now, I understand, young person, you're not going to have the police knock at your door and say, okay, you did this, this, and this, you're done. You're going down the station and this is it.

We're going to stone you. I realize that we live in the United States of America. It's a different country.

We're not in a theocracy. Again, there'll be a theocracy one day. It's called the millennial rule of Christ.

You study it. Jesus will rule, okay? So we get the understanding.

But the point is, that's what God said happened in Old Testament Israel. There would be fear. Now, what's this what I call durative disobedience?

It's not just disobeying your parents because all of us would obviously be executed. It's durative disobedience, continual disobedience. It's the kind of disobedience, you do it, you get caught.

Then you do it again, and you get caught, and you do it again, and you get caught, and you do it again, and you get caught.

Now you know how to get around that. And you keep doing it. That's what it's talking about.

Durative disobedience. It's talking about the sneaking behind your parents' back. Maybe they say, hey, we don't want you around that group, that friend, I don't think that friend's good for you.

I want you to stay distanced. But you don't. You sneak behind their back.

You rendezvous. Maybe a guy grew a relationship they don't want you in. You sneak it.

You go for it. Maybe you get caught. You figure out how to do it better.

And et cetera. And then life goes on. So that happened, unfortunately, all the time.

So God says in that case, there would be obviously execution. Now I will tell you, I thank the Lord for my dear mother because she really, there's one of the reasons I know about Deuteronomy 21, it's my mother.

She was orphaned, as I mentioned last night. And so when she got married to my dad and saw that she probably was going to have a lot of kids, she actually had fear in her heart because she thought, I don't know how to raise kids. And of course the 60s were coming in, media was coming in, television was coming in.

And in her mind, she kind of had a vision, not like a supernatural vision, but she just had this picture of a room, a den, full of teenagers, and the television blaring and cigarette smoke hanging in the middle of the room. And it just like horrified her. It would be awful to have a bunch of kids who watch whatever they want to watch, live profligate lives, and it horrified her.

So she saw this passage in Deuteronomy. And she said, well, we don't live in a theocracy, but she said, you know, I can pray this way. And so here's how she began to pray.

She said, God, if I have any kid that will rebel against you and dishonor your name and go away from God, God, as hard as it would be, I'd rather have you take him home to heaven prematurely than live in this earth and bring disgrace to your name.

She began to pray that. And she prayed on a regular basis, and my mom joined her. I don't know how they did it all, but they both prayed it, and we knew it.

And my mother would tell me that on several occasions. Jim, she'd often do it with tears. I knew she loved me.

That wasn't the problem, but she loved Jesus more. And she prayed now. She said, no, Jim, I'm really prayed.

If you don't love God, if you rebel against God, bring disgrace to his name, I'd rather have you in heaven early.

Now, when your parents answer, God answers their prayer, And they pray this kind of prayer and tell you, as a teenager, you have two options. So one option was rebel against God and die prematurely. And the other one was follow God, live for God, and live.

So you can guess which one I chose. I'm not dumb. Now, I'm going to be honest with you.

I thank God that my mother loved Jesus enough. That was her heart. She didn't want any of us to die prematurely.

But I will tell you friend she was willing. Don't see all this as negative. What God is simply saying is this can't be tolerated in your life.

Some of you don't realize the absolute devastation you are doing to a foundation for a future life just the way you treat your parents. Because I don't know if you understand this about society and I don't know if you understand this about the family and I don't know if you understand this about everything God has set up. He has authority structures.

If you're disrespectful to your parents pretty good chance you'll be disrespectful to the policeman who stops you. You know why some kids. You know we talk about police brutality.

And I'm not debating that there there's some reality and some of that. But I don't think it's a lot of it. You know what I think a lot of it is a bunch of kids who treated their parents like dirt.

And they think they can treat cops like dirt. See it'll do a whole lot better for you if you learn to respect the people God tells you to respect. Don't roll your eyes at your parents.

Don't huff. Don't walk off storm off, slam the door. You say well my parents aren't very spiritual people.

Well show them what a Christian ought to be like. Listen you may come from a difficult situation. I'm just telling you there may be issues you have to deal with.

There may be situations where your parents do things you have to get a pastor involved or whatever,. I understand all that.

I'm just simply saying disrespect is never the answer. That's all I'm trying to get you to get. That's all I think God's trying to get you to get.

God's three death sentences for dishonoring. Now, I'm not trying to be morbid at all.

But one day, probably for 99% of you, you're going to bury your parents. It's just the way life is. I've buried my parents.

It was not fun. I thank God for his grace. I didn't enjoy it, but I thank God for his grace because the memory of the just is blessed.

I was able to bury them with a certain amount of appreciation and gratitude, a lot of appreciation and gratitude for them. But I'm just telling you, young people, you're going to bury your parents.

And when you bury them, you have only two ways to bury them. Number one, with regret. Number two, with no regret.

And if you want to bury them with no regrets, you know what you've got to do? Deal with your regret right now.

Years ago. I just surrendered to the call to preach 16 maybe 17. My dad was a pastor in Chicago Marquette Manor Baptist Church.

He comes to me one day and says Jimmy that's what he called me Jimmy. He said um I just got a call from the hospital. He said um I was a lady.

She had a stroke. She's in bad shape. And the family's asked me to come.

He said I want you to come along. He said you're going to be a you're going to be in the Lord's work. He thought I was going to be a pastor at the time He said, you need to learn.

I mean, I'm scared to death. So I hop in the car with my dad. Loved to be with my dad.

So that was pretty cool. I think we took the Duster. That was such a cool car.

But anyway, 19 said Plymouth Duster. Okay, we got in that Duster. How many old people out there remember the Plymouth Duster?

Yeah, it was a cool car, wasn't it? Okay, but anyway. And so we got in the Duster, and we drove down there to the city, and we came into a pretty serious situation.

This lady had all kinds of tubes. She was very old, and all these tubes in her, and her family was just sitting there just broken.

And my dad prayed with them. I can't remember. He figured out who they were.

They hardly came to church, but they identified with Marquette Manor and all this kind of stuff, and I watched my dad in action. He was great. We walked out the door.

My dad leaned over to me and says, Jimmy, that lady's not going to make it. He says, will you watch? We'll have that funeral.

A few weeks later, my dad comes to me. He says, you remember that lady? He said, well, she did pass away, and they've asked me to the funeral.

He says, Jimmy. He said, I want you to come with me to the funeral, and I want you to help me do the funeral. I was scared to death.

I hopped in the car, Plymouth. Did I tell you Plymouth Duster was a cool car? But anyway, and we got in the car, and we started driving to the funeral home, I think it was.

And my dad started coaching me. He said, now, Jimmy, he says, it's probably not going to happen. But he says, every once in a while, when they close the casket, the family goes berserk.

He said, and if that happens, don't worry about it. Don't do anything.

I'll take care of it I'm thinking oh man I hope that doesn't happen you guys ever heard of Murphy's Law somebody needs to execute that guy named Murphy I'm telling you it happened I'm saying we do the funeral I did the Scripture reading you know we're doing the funeral and they're closing the casket pandemonium broke out they're screaming they're yelling the daughter gets into the casket grabs the mother's body I mean I was shocked I was petrified you say what did you do?

Nothing that's what my dad told me to do I'm thinking what do we do? And my dad calmed them all down we got the casket closed and who was I glad to get out of there you say preacher why do you think stuff like that happens? Regret regret unresolved regret I just pulled into Mississippi Valley Christian School and we're going to have a ministry week there in September 1989.

I received a phone call from my father-in-law. He said to my wife, he said, you need to tell Jim that his mom's in heaven. I knew she was bad off.

We were expecting her home going, but if you've ever been through this, you know you never expect it. I mean, you know it's going to happen, but it's still a shock.

I hardly remember the next few moments. Finally got home. Somebody came in to substitute for me.

I do remember at the Marquette Manor Baptist Church walking by the casket for the very last time looking down at my dear mother.

Can I say this in person? My heart was overfilled with grief, but I will tell you this.

No regret. No regret. Any issues have been long taken care of, long before taken care of.

That was 1989.

That's a long time ago.

That lady impacts my life probably every day. Every time I preach. If you say preach it that was a pretty strong message this morning.

Don't blame me. It comes from my mother. She preached it to me.

I will tell you in 1997 I was called my dad up he was having a missions conference in Atlanta. I said dad I'm coming through Atlanta maybe we can catch lunch. And he said yeah.

So you know we stopped and parked the trailer there at the church in Atlanta and went over to, I could take you to the exact place, the Golden Corral, and we sat down, we ate.

I could tell my dad wasn't feeling very well, but you have to understand, he battled congestive heart failure for 15 years. He was close to the grave, then he bounced back. It was kind of like, he's always going to make, he's going to make.

But I remember I was a little alarmed when he said, Jimmy, I don't think I can preach tonight. He says, you preach for me.

And so I said, okay, Dad. And so I preached, and I noticed when I was preaching, he didn't look good.

As soon as we were done with the message, he threw up. I didn't realize that at the time, but that's a sign of heart trouble.

He started feeling better. We went down to the pastor's basement where he was staying and I remember talking with him about a bunch of things and I amazingly said to my dad, what's going to happen when you die, dad? He said, what's going to happen is my heart's going to go into atrial fibrillation.

He said, normally it breaks out of it and then I'm okay. But he said, the time I'm going to go home, it'll just stop.

That's exactly what happened hours later. In the middle of the night sometime, we don't know exactly, he got up, he would sleep in a chair because of congestive heart failure, he couldn't be flat, and sleeping in some kind of recliner.

And he evidently got up in the middle of the night and his heart was probably in atrial fibrillation and his heart stopped and before his body hit the floor, he was in heaven.

I remember I got up that morning, had no idea. I was concerned about him, but no idea.

And all of a sudden I heard a squeal of tires out to my RV. I heard the door open. I opened the door.

I had little Stephanie in my arms and the pastor said, Jim, I hate to tell you this, but your dad's gone.

I jumped in his car with Stephanie, yelled something to my wife. We drove over to the pastor's home, which is just around the corner.

I went in that house, went down the stairs. Of course, I'd been there the night before and my dad's fallen body was right there at the bottom of the stairs.

Next few hours are a blur I can hardly remember them somehow I got an airplane came up here because Marquette Manor's auditorium was completely being remodeled they had the funeral right here right here my dad's casket was somewhere somewhere right about here 1997 March and I remember right on this piece of property right here walking by a beautiful wooden casket and I remember walking by seeing my dad's earthly tabernacle.

No regret. Not that I was a perfect kid, I wasn't. But any issues have been solved a long time ago.

No regret. You're either going to bury your parents with a regret or you're going to bury them with no regret.