Jim Van Gelderen: Okay, well, we're going to get right into the word of God here this morning. And I appreciate already your good spirit. Good attention, but we're going to the book of Romans.

So if you join me and go in the book of Romans, we're going to go to chapter number 13, Romans chapter number 13. And I want to deal with an issue that, well actually something here that the Bible helps us with. And so we'll just dive into this and I hope this will be a help to you.

Several years ago I presented this particular opening illustration, and I can't remember if I did it here or not, but that's really beside the point. But when I was growing up, my dad would often preach Sunday nights on kind of contemporary issues. And I always enjoyed Sunday night of the three services in a week.

Sunday night was my favorite service, just the way it was growing up. Part of it was because my dad would often talk about things, and he'd take Bible perspective of contemporary issues, deal with some of the prophecies and things. And I remember as he was dealing with that, that he would from time to time, not a lot, but he mentioned it enough that I remembered it.

And he would talk about the work of an unsaved man, an unsaved sociologist or anthropologist in Britain years before, I think by the name of J.D. Unwin, U-N-W-I-N. And J.D.

Unwin was obviously not saved. And he was an anthropologist which studied man and sociologists, society, etc. And he decided to study a subject of sexuality and culture and how they mesh together.

And as I understand it, when he approached his study, which was an academic study, he had the premise that if you loosened morality, that culture would flourish. And so he studied 86 cultures, and when he did, he came to a stunning opposite conclusion, that when you loosen morality, culture doesn't flourish, it declines, it dies.

And so in the study, I've never read the study, people who have read it say it's a snooze fest, you know what I'm talking about, in other words it'd be very hard to read, but he wrote a book called Sex and Culture and an academic tome on this subject matter that reflected his academic study.

Of course it's probably hard to read and only the people that are really cerebral could probably really come up with understanding it, but I read a guy by the name of Durston, who is on Renew, for those who know a little bit about Renew.

Durston read it multiple times and spit it back up for us for the rest of us to understand it, and he talked about the fact that there was a point in culture when they made a decision, and that decision obviously had effect, and he said what happened is culture would begin to decline if they lose some morality, and the very first indication that the downward progress had begun would be that they, this is his words, they no longer required prenuptial chastity.

And I just love those days because they use more Victorian English. Appropriate, very appropriate. No longer required prenuptial chastity.

In other words, They did not require, culture would no longer require young people entering marriage morally pure. That they had impurities, they had other relationships, they'd gotten involved in moral impurity, sexual sin, and culture no longer looked down on that. He said when that occurred, he said the culture has three generations and it will cease to exist.

Now three generations would be about 33 years. So basically what it means, after 100 years, that culture would cease to exist. Now, he studied 86 cultures, and do you know how many exceptions he found to that?

And the answer is none. 86 cultures, when they no longer required prenuptial chastity, 100 years later, that culture did not exist. He said in most cases, there was a military overthrow.

In other words, a stronger culture came in and militarily overthrew the decadent culture. He said, in some cases, no shots were fired, but the stronger culture just slowly overcame the weaker culture.

And without a shot being fired, the stronger culture became the dominant culture and overtook it. That is, by the way, what you are seeing happen in Europe right now. Right now, a stronger culture, Islam, is overtaking the decadent Western culture, and it's happening before your very eyes.

Since Europe precedes the United States, we are watching our future unless we change things. So hopefully you understand this. So Durstan, as he read it, pointed out the very first thing that Unwin said starts their downward decline is when you no longer require prenuptial chastity.

Now, you obviously were born later. I was born at a time when United States culture required prenuptial chastity. I remember when a girl got pregnant and she was not married, there was a lot of shame to that.

And often girls would ship out. They'd leave their home area. They'd go somewhere else to have the baby and give it up for adoption because that was looked down on.

And that was something that nobody really wanted to be a part of. And so I have seen, I remember a time when prenuptial chastity was required by culture. You know what I mean by that?

Culture at large said this is what's got to happen or there are negative consequences. Now obviously you live in a culture where that's not it at all. There's many sports figures who have girlfriends and they have children and nobody thinks twice about it.

They're not even married. They're living in sin. The Bible would call it, they're living in sin.

Their evidence of their sin is there in their children, and nobody thinks twice about it. Everybody thinks just that's normal. So American culture clearly no longer requires prenuptial chastity, just doesn't.

Culture doesn't anymore. Now, Unwin pointed out that the very first thing that would happen, culture would no longer require prenuptial chastity. In the first 33 years, things would seem to be okay.

In other words, it looked like culture was eating its cake, so to speak. I mean, it was doing what it wanted to do, eating a cake and getting away with it, so to speak. They would, in other words, the older culture, older generation kind of keeps a lid on things.

And for 33 years, it doesn't look like there's any consequence for changing your morality. But in the second 33 years is what we call the second generation, something happened. So let's try for a moment to conclude, when did American culture change?

Some might say the 60s, that might be a little premature. Certainly the revolution began in the 50s and 60s, but where culture fully accepted and embraced it had to be the 70s or the 80s. But however you date it, wherever you date the beginning, we are in the second generation.

There's no doubt about it, that we are in a second generation of moral decadence. Because the decision was made, culture began to accept prenuptial, no longer required prenuptial chastity. And so we're definitely in a second generation.

Now, the thing that Unwin pointed out that is very interesting, he said there are three indications in the second generation that indicate that the culture is on target. It's time-wise going to be heading for destruction. Now, let me just say this, young people, I want you to get this.

If J.D. Unwin is correct, and Lord tarries His coming, many of you sitting here will one day live in the United States of America, but it will no longer be the United States of America. A stronger culture will have either taken us, overtaken us militarily, or a stronger culture will have overtaken us from within.

And that means probably not in my lifetime, but probably in your lifetime, if you live a full life, you will see the fulfillment of this if J.D. Unwin is correct. Okay, so morality is a big deal.

But the three indications that indicate that the 100-year timetable is on target to happen would be in that second generation. So let me give you these three, and you'll have to make the judgment whether you feel like American culture is in the second generation of our decline. Okay, number one, the first thing is monogamy declines.

Now, monogamy would be one man, one woman, joined together in holy matrimony and are faithful to each other until death parts them. Okay, so what would be the enemies of monogamy? Okay, where a husband and wife, they get married, but they do not stay exclusive for one another in the sexual arena.

Okay, there's two things I can think of. Number one, the clear one is adultery. When a partner cheats on the other partner, That's clearly, it breaks monogamy.

And the second one would be divorce. Okay, divorce particularly and remarriage. There's a divorce and then they marry somebody else so that the monogamy is broken.

Of course, we all know the word mono is the word for what? One, okay, monogamy means you get married, you're faithful to that marriage partner, there's nobody else until death parts you and the marriage is broken. Okay, so those two things would be, those two things would indicate that monogamy is on the decline.

So we'd have to ask ourselves the question, do we live in a culture where we are seeing more adultery and more divorce and remarriage than we did in previous generations? And the answer is, well, yes. Okay, so number one, we've got the first indication we're in trouble.

Number two, the second indication is, according to Unwin, deism declines. Now, when we use the word deism, or at least when Unwin uses it, he's clearly not using it in a Thomas Jefferson way. For those of you that know philosophy, Thomas Jefferson was a deist.

He was not saved. Okay, so, but that's not what it's talking about. Deism, according to what Unwin would be talking about, we call religion.

Okay, so religion declines. A few years ago, the survey that's done every year, I don't know how many years it's been done, found out for the first time since they started doing the survey that in the United States of America, the nones, and by the way, the nones are people who claim no religious affiliation. The nones now outnumber those that claim religious affiliation.

So we can say, at least even academically, that deism is declining. Yeah, the people who claim no religious affiliation now outnumber in our country those who do claim religious affiliation. So deism is declining.

Number three, rationalism declines. Now when we use the word rationalism, we're not talking capital R, we're talking little r. Of course, for those of you that understand philosophy and history, know there was a time in history where rationalism was a big deal, capital R.

Okay, there was a whole movement of rationalism. We're talking little r. Now rationalism simply means this, it's the idea of the reign of truth.

In other words, what's true is what dominates philosophy of a culture. So in this second generation, rationalism or the reign of truth declines. In other words, what Unwin was saying is this, that in that second generation, truth no longer matters.

What really matters is how you feel. In other words, if you're a male, but you feel like a female, The decadent culture accepts that. And when a culture accepts that, it's an indication that the culture is in decline.

I want all you young people to get this. All this gender bender stuff is an indication your culture is crumbling. And if you don't do something about it, you will find out that one day you will be living in a country that no longer has a government in Washington, D.C., run by a constitution and the rule of law.

It will no longer be the country you're living in. Because we're in the second generation. And the three indicators are there that we're there.

We're there fully. Okay, now remember where it all began. It all began when I could say biblical morality was no longer [unclear] by our country.

Now what you may not understand is there was a time in our country when this country embraced biblical values. Now what you may not understand is our country has had times of great trouble. In fact, after the American Revolution, in the early days of our country, we almost lost this country to something called atheism.

Did you know there was a day, percentage-wise, when there were more atheists in the United States than there are today? There was a day, when it comes to atheism, that was worse than the day we live in. It was in the early, late 1700s, early 1800s, and as a result, preachers got very concerned, and one preacher wrote out what's called a circular letter, and he called for a concert of prayer.

To make a long story very short, and I'm broad brushing, God used those prayer meetings to bring the Second Great Awakening. Now the First Great Awakening was a wonderful awakening, and I'm not minimizing it at all. But the Second Great Awakening framed the United States you lived in.

Some people say it lasted 75 years. So there were people born at the beginning of the Second Great Awakening lived 75 years and died, and there never was a time in their lifetime when Holy Ghost revival was not happening somewhere in North America.

I was just in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia a few months ago, and the pastor told me, he said, during the Second Great Awakening, a wave of revival reached the bottom of Nova Scotia, which is Yarmouth. It's the southernmost point of the province of Nova Scotia. He said, there was a time in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia, 80% of the population claimed Jesus Christ as their personal Savior.

80%. Now that's a stunning thought when you consider 80%. And he said, the church that began that revival is gone, and now it's a parking lot, which is a representation of Yarmouth, Nova Scotia today.

There's a fraction of people saved in Yarmouth today. But the Second Great Awakening, that's what happened. It went through North America, primarily the United States.

And can I say this? The Second Great Awakening turned this country into a Christian country, and we had biblical values.

So that by the time the early 1900s, and the Second Great Awakening was always already decades finished, just a couple decades old, but its effect was still there, into the early 1900s, and for instance in Northwestern University, the Dean of Women at one of the Big Ten schools, Northwestern University berated the young ladies for frivolously holding hands with their boyfriends.

Can you imagine that happening at Northwestern today? She'd be laughed out of the room.

Okay, where did that come from? Where did a Big Ten school have a dean of women who challenged the young ladies not even to hold hands with their boyfriends? Where did that come from?

It came from the Second Great Awakening.

See, biblical values were pervasive across this country. And of course it is what God blessed this country with. And so there was waves of how do we say this financial blessing that came across this country of which you benefit from right now.

The United States is a blessed land. I believe it all comes because they were a very biblical people for for almost a century. Okay and of course the 1900s has slowly seen the effects of the second great Awakening completely kind of die off, which means your generation needs to pray in the Third Great Awakening.

And it's your responsibility. Because if you don't, like I said, you will not live in the United States. Oh, it may be called the United States, but it will have Sharia law or something else.

And it will no longer be the country you are living in right now, according to J.D. Unwin. And I think he may be right.

Okay, so you say, why do you do all that? It's a little doomsday. I'm not trying to put a little damper on you, but I want you to realize what you're up against.

So I thought to myself, after I really considered, read a little bit of Durston, and of course when Renew series comes out here in a few months, some of you will see the professor Durston talk about Unwin and things like that, but why, I thought to myself, why is that true? Why would morality be tied to the destruction of a country?

Why would the one thing, when a country no longer requires prenuptial chastity, why would that be the thing that would cause the demise of that country?

And I really did think about it theologically. In other words, how do I say this? I wouldn't get up here and preach this if it didn't have some biblical roots to it.

And I began to think about it and I came to this conclusion. The real issue then that destroys a country when they embrace moral impurity is what it says in James chapter number one. Lust, when it's conceived, bringeth forth sin.

Sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death. Now why? Here's why.

Every man, when he is tempted, is drawn away of his. Could you tell me the next two words?

Yeah. You know why moral impurity destroys a country? Because it's the moment the country no longer lives for others, they live for themselves.

It's selfish. So what destroys a country really is not moral impurity, it's the selfishness that drives the moral impurity. Now I want you to see this because I want you to see it biblically because you all need to be a part of the solution.

Let me just say, if you're being compromising and the [unclear] junk you're looking at, the media as you watch, If you're watching movies with sensuality, and you are inflaming your lusts, and you're looking at things that increase your passions, I am telling you right now, you are part of the problem.

And I'm just telling you young people in this room, you need to be part of the solution.

So let's look, if you can please, at a biblical understanding of why. So go to Romans chapter 13, I know it was a long introduction, but it won't be long, and it won't be hard to get this. Let's go to Romans chapter 13, look at verse number 8.

Owe no man anything, here it is, but to what? Love one another. For he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.

Okay, now I want you to go, we'll go down through verse number nine, go down to the very end. If there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this saying, namely, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Love worketh no ill to his neighbor, therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.

Now, let me just say this. What God is saying is this. The Bible could disappear and it won't because it's eternal.

But if the Bible disappeared and all you had left was, thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself, you would have enough to know God's will for your life in interacting with other people. That principle alone would give you all you need when it comes to interacting with other people. Did you know that?

Why? Because love is the fulfilling of the law. So if you always make the decision to interact with people based on love, you'll always do God's will.

And if you make selfish decisions, you will always break God's will or God's law. Why? Because love is the fulfilling of the law.

You can't fulfill the law without love. So God is saying love is really the key to obeying God in relational issues. Obviously, we're not talking about our relationship with God right now, though obviously love's a part of that.

God's talking about our relationship with other people. Now, I skipped over something, but I want you to go back. Notice He gives us five of the Ten Commandments.

Look at verse number 9, For this thou shalt not commit adultery, thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, thou shalt not bear false witness, and thou shalt not covet. If there be any other commandment, it is briefly comprehended in this statement, namely thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. He gives us five of the Ten Commandments.

Now, I just want to go through all of them but the first, and then we'll obviously finish on the first, because that's our emphasis. Thou shalt not kill. Have you ever thought about this?

You never kill people you love. Have you ever thought about that? That's why your kid brothers and sisters are still alive.

You know what I'm talking about? You know why you don't knock them off? Because you love them.

I mean, you'll be honest with you. At least you hope you do. Okay, you get the idea.

Josiah thought it was funny. I mean, he's got his brother. Okay, Micah.

Okay, but anyway, okay. But, you know, the point is, you know, sometimes we get frustrated. Why don't we kill people?

Because we love them. I know this sounds crazy, but if you murder somebody, you didn't love them.

That's pretty obvious, isn't it? How about thou shalt not steal? You know, if you steal from someone, you know what it means?

You don't care about them. I'm talking to probably some young people who steal from their parents. I know hard copy money is not around as much as it used to be, but maybe some of you still do.

You know, I've had known kids go in their dad's wallet, They're going to their mom's purse and steal some stuff. I can just tell you this. If you steal from your parents, you do not love your parents.

Because if you loved them, you wouldn't steal from them. If you steal from your brothers and sisters, you really don't love your brothers and sisters. Why?

Because if you loved them, you wouldn't steal from them. Are you getting this? See, if you love somebody, you will not take something that's theirs.

You just won't do it. Thou shalt not steal is not hard to do when you love people. Why do people steal?

Because they love themselves. Okay, I'll go to the next one. Thou shalt not bear false witness.

If you lie to people, you don't love them. If you lie to your parents, you don't love your parents. If you lie to your teacher, you don't love your teacher.

The point is, if you love someone, you will not bear false witness. You will not lie to them. Any of you out here that are liars, I'm just telling you right now, you obviously don't love the people you lie to.

You say, well, preacher, who do you love? And the answer is yourself. That's who you love.

Okay, so let's keep going. Thou shalt not covet. Okay, what does covet mean?

In other words, when you love somebody, you're not jealous when good things happen to them. When you love people, you're thinking, man, I'm glad they had that opportunity.

Now, I will say, gang, I grew up in a preacher's home in the 1960s and 70s. That's when I was a child and then a teenager. And I will tell you, I look back to my upbringing and I realized something a few years ago that I never realized.

And that is, my parents were poor. We were poor I just didn't realize it. You know if I had a can of coke if I got a coke or a pepsi as a kid growing up I thought I had arrived.

You say why. Because we always drank the generic stuff. When I went to school I always had generic pop.

Okay I from chicago up here it's soda but in in chicago it was pop. And we always had generic pop. We never had the real stuff.

We would go to the day-old hostess store to buy the Twinkies, you know, and the cupcakes and whatever those things are, the ding-dongs and all that kind of stuff.

We would go to the day-old. I never thought anything about it. I thought that's what you did.

You know what I had for chips, generic chips? Man, if I ever had Frito-Lay, man, I had arrived. I always had, who knows what it was back then.

It wasn't great value. It was worse. But anyway, you know, it was, I mean, great value is way better than the generics of my day, okay.

But so I realized growing up, you know, man, I mean, I just realized, you know, we were poor. We did a lot of fun stuff, don't get me wrong, but I will say this. My daughters have got to do a whole lot more stuff than I ever got to do, because we live in a different culture.

And money is way more prevalent than it was when I was growing up. Our country is not nearly affluent then as it is now. And so my daughters have gotten to do a whole lot more stuff than I've ever done.

Do you know I've never been jealous of my daughters? You know why? Because I love them.

You know you're not jealous of people that you love? You're not jealous when somebody gets an opportunity to do something you don't get to do. You're glad, man, they got the opportunity to do that.

That's pretty cool. I had to leave part of my team in Southern California here, and Austin and I came up here. They got to the church we're staying at, and they found out that their Wednesday night service is not Wednesday, it's Thursday.

So they went down to see the Brewers win last night in Petco Park in San Diego. And you know what? I'm just glad they got that opportunity.

That's pretty cool, isn't it? Go watch your team. Of course, a couple of them are big Brewers fans.

Got to go watch it in person and see the Brewers clinch that series. I'm glad they have that opportunity. You know why?

I really do love them. I want them to have good opportunities. You see, the point is when you covet, it's all about you.

You don't care about other people having good opportunities. You'd rather it happen to you. But if you really love somebody, you're glad when good things happen to them that maybe you don't get to do, get a part of.

Are you seeing what it is, friends? So here's what I'm coming down to. What God is simply saying is the problem, the core problem issue is selfishness.

But notice if you would please, the very first command that God tells us kind of helps us understand whether we're selfish or not. There it is. In verse number 9, what does it say?

Thou shalt not commit adultery. Now I just want to, I've got 15 minutes left and I want to make this application. What is adultery?

Well, you say, preacher, it's a married couple that cheats on one another. Well, that certainly is true, but it's more than that. Do you remember what Jesus said in the book of Matthew chapter 5?

He said, Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery. But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.

Jesus takes the issue of adultery from just being actions to being thought processes. Which indicates, friends, that you can adulterate the purity of a future marriage.

In James chapter 4, talking of spiritual adultery, there's strong language in James chapter 4. Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.

You know that verse. He's not talking about physical adultery. He's talking about spiritual adultery.

In other words, friends, when you and I got saved, we became a part of the bride of Christ. We're engaged to Jesus Christ. We're not married yet.

We're waiting for the trumpet. And when the trumpet sounds, we're pulled out. And then there's going to be the marriage supper of the Lamb.

And we are going to, obviously, there's going to be a marriage between the bride, which is God's people here in this age. And there's going to be a marriage between the bride and the bridegroom, Jesus Christ. But we're not married right now.

And yet, God calls them adulterers spiritually. Why? Because they're flirting with the world.

Spiritual adultery. All I'm saying is this. You can adulterate the purity of a future marriage.

And I'm going to tell you why you do it. Because you're selfish. You know, guys, why you think dirty thoughts?

Because you're selfish. Young ladies, you know why you read romance novels and fantasize about some guy, you know, some romance? Because you're selfish.

Because if you weren't selfish, guess what? You would love your wife so much, even if you don't know who she is, or you'd love your future husband so much, even though you don't know who he is, that you'd work hard to keep your heart for just that future one.

See, here's what purity is. It's keeping your body, your heart, your mind, it's keeping all of those things for the intimacy God created between a man and a woman in the bonds of marriage. It's keeping it for just that.

So could I put it this way? Impurity or adultery, adultering the purity of a future marriage, is introducing someone into the intimacy God created for a husband and wife who is not your husband and wife. It could be mental, it could be physical, it could be actual, or it could be mental, it could be emotional.

There are different ways you can adulterate the purity of a future marriage. But here's what I want you to see. The reason you do it is one reason.

Selfishness. So as a result of the moral demise in our culture, selfishness is not, we're not only tempted with selfishness, when you engage in moral impurity, you increase your selfishness. A guy who's looking at filth on the internet becomes extremely selfish.

It was selfishness that caused him to get in it, but it is selfishness then becomes, is multiplied as a result of his actions. So he doesn't realize selfishness caused him, but selfishness now is on steroids, and selfishness becomes multiplied. The most selfish guys in this room are the guys who are defeated in the garbage they're looking at.

You are selfish to the core because if you weren't selfish you'd run to somebody in your life and say I got to have victory. I want to be pure. I want to keep myself from my future wife.

I want to keep myself from my future kids and my future grandkids. Several years ago I watched a video series. Won't name it at the moment.

Some of you know what I'm talking about. And in that video series he talked about something called new science. The funny part is you won't hear about it in the secular world but this was a very reputable video that I heard, and they had several doctors and scientists on, and they said they've now discovered that actions affect DNA.

In other words, what you do affects the DNA you transfer to your kids. If you become an alcoholic, you put a marker on your DNA, which means you transfer that to your kid, so if your kid takes one drink, he could become an alcoholic.

But they say the same thing's true of moral filth. If you're looking at garbage on the internet, you put a marker on your DNA, so when you transfer that to your kid, he will be far more likely to become an addict at looking at filth than he would have been if you didn't do it.

Can I say this for you guys that look at filth? You don't love your future kids.

You don't love your grandkids. You know why you do it? Because you love you.

Because if you loved your grandkids and you loved your kids, you'd do everything you could to get victory. You know what? I've learned this about helping guys out of moral filth.

I can't want victory more than you. You have got to be the one that wants it. And young ladies, the same thing can happen to you.

And what I'm saying is that if you really love someone, you're not going to put a marker in your DNA and transfer it to the next generation. Now, the good news they say is if you clean up, you know, if you see God give you victory in your life over this stuff, the marker leaves.

Some of you guys that are into this stuff you know what you need to do. I don't want to get married. I got to get that marker off my DNA.

But the reason some of you won't is because you love yourself too much. Now I know I'm being blunt and I'm known being forthcoming about this. But I am very burdened for many of you in this room.

You've got to deal with this garbage. And by the way if you come from a sheltered home and you say preacher I'm not really sure what you're talking about I'm telling you, I'm thrilled you don't.

Because your greatest protection from moral bondage, I've said it before, I probably say it every time I preach on moral issues, your greatest protection from moral bondage, or bondage to filth, your greatest protection is innocence.

And when you lose it, you can't get it back. Every guy in here has a sickening feeling in your gut for those of you that have lost it.

And by the way, for those of you that are still innocent, someone's going to try to steal your innocency at some time. It's coming. And you better make a decision right now what you're going to do when that happens.

Because I would encourage you to do exactly what Joseph did. Flee youthful lust. [Unclear] your two good legs and get out of there and find somebody who loves you and cares about you and says, hey, somebody tried to show me garbage on the internet.

Because you better have a strategy now, because the day's coming. Too much filth out there, too many wicked people out there, too many compromised Christians out there. It's coming.

It it doesn't mean it can't happen in your realm of life. And you need to make a decision right now, I'm not going there, not going there.

Because what God's trying to help you understand, friend, love is the fulfilling of the law.

And when you adulterate the purity of a future marriage by the garbage you look at, by the things you do with a girlfriend, boyfriend, when you begin to adulterate the purity of that future marriage, it not only do you do it because you're selfish, as I mentioned a moment ago, it multiplies your selfishness So you become a very selfish human being.

And I want you to understand some of you are headed there. And I know this is going to be blunt. I'm not trying to be mean.

But God pity the girl that gets you. You're not married yet, but you'll understand that. There's a lot of married people back there.

I'm going to tell you, I tell this to BCM students from time to time because I want them to know that when you get married, you're going to bring a really big problem into your marriage. I hate to tell you this, but when you get married, you're going to bring a huge problem into your marriage. You know what it is?

You. Because you're way more selfish than you realize. And when you get married, I hate to tell you this, but your selfishness will be exposed.

Now, you say, well, preacher, I can hide it, man. I'm a really good actor. I can act like I love my wife, even though I'm selfish.

Well, you know the greatest actors on planet Earth? You know where they live? A place called Hollywood.

So how do the actors of Hollywood do on long marriages? How do they do? I mean, the greatest actors on planet Earth, how do they do?

They have long, wonderful marriages, right? Wrong. Why?

I don't care how good an actor you are. If you're selfish, your wife will pick it up. I know this so much about women.

They can smell selfishness, and you can't fool them. If you're selfish, they're going to know, probably sooner than you'd like to admit.

And I'm just telling you right now, you have to make a decision. You have to make a decision. I'm going to deal with my selfishness.

You know what that means? It's not about you. That means if you're struggling with moral impurity, maybe the internet, YouTube, movies, whatever, media choices, if you're struggling with this stuff, you need to beeline, hopefully, to your dad.

But if you feel like your dad can't help you spiritually, get to a spiritual leader in your life and say, I don't care what it takes. I've got to have victory. You say, why?

Because it's not about you. You know why you act like you're not having a problem when you are? Because it's all about you.

It's not about your kids. It's not about your grandkids. It's not about your future spouse.

It's all about you. Because if it was about your future spouse, your future kids and your future grandkids, you wouldn't care about consequences. You just got to say, I've got to get free.

I don't care what it takes. I'm telling you, friends, I travel with some of the finest young men on planet Earth, and I have for about 15, 20 years, travel with young men who have obviously been raised in the technology era that you have been raised in.

I wish I could tell you that they didn't struggle with this issue. But rare is the guy who travels with me who has not had serious failure in the area I'm preaching on.

And many of their testimonies God powerfully uses because now they are having victory. But every one of them would tell you, you never get victory alone.

Secrecy is Satan's greatest weapon to keep you in bondage. And some of you just need to make the decision that this week I'm done, I'm coming clean, I want out, I don't want to transfer moral impurity DNA to my kids. I love them more than that even though they haven't been born yet.

And by the way, if you don't think you'll love your kids, just go to some new parent and ask them how much they love their kids. And I will tell you, I rarely come across a new parent who didn't say, man, I didn't realize how much you love these critters, because it's true.

I knew my parents loved me, but I never knew how much until in 1995, August 27th, in the middle of the night, when Stephanie Joy was put in my arms, and then I said, nobody warned me.

I didn't realize you love kids like this. And I still love my daughter. I love her more than the day they put her in my arms, and I loved her a whole lot that day.

Of all my three daughters. In a way that I can't explain to you, and you'll never know until they put the kid in your arms.

But it's a little too late at that point for all you guys looking at the garbage and the filth.

Now don't get me wrong, hopefully you can help your kid, because they say that if a kid never takes a drink and he's got the alcoholic DNA, he's okay. You know what he does? The DNA marker leaves and he transfers to his kids a DNA that doesn't have that marker anymore.

That's probably one of the reasons Donald Trump doesn't drink. I mean, you know, I'm not saying Donald Trump's perfect. Honestly, a piece of duct tape on his mouth might help most of the time, but anyway, you know.

But I will tell you, I admire the fact the man doesn't drink. See, if your kids don't look at moral filth, yeah, they'll transfer to their kids clean DNA, but wouldn't you like to transfer them to some clean DNA?

I don't understand all that, I really don't. I'm not a scientist, I'm just telling you what I've heard.

But see, what God wants you to understand is selfishness is the core of this issue, that's why culture is being destroyed. You're either part of the destruction or you're part of the solution. This generation needs a generation of young people to go up and say, hey, God's grace is more than enough.

You don't have to be defeated, you don't have to be looking at garbage, you don't have to be in bondage to moral filth, you don't have to watch movies that compromise your conscience, you don't have to scroll through YouTube and watch things that defile your conscience and grieve the Holy Spirit. You don't have to do that.

But you've got to make serious decisions, friends, and you need many times accountability, and you need a pastor and a youth pastor, especially if there's been failure in your life, and you need some things in your life. God says two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor. A threefold cord is not easily broken.

It means you need others to help you that are godly. You know, if you're falling off a cliff, Would you want a three-year-old there to rescue, or would you want a 25-year-old weightlifter?

You grab on a three-year-old, guess what? You're both going off the cliff. 25-year-old weightlifter with his little finger can flip you over his head.

I think I want the 25-year-old weightlifter. In other words, you know what young people say? Well, I'll get accountable to my best friend.

Yeah, he's struggling just like you are. You need to get somebody who's walking with God, who's had sustained victory in their life, who knows how to have victory, who can give you guidance and help and protection. You see, that's the idea.

Two are better than one. If they fall, the one will help up his fellow, Ecclesiastes chapter number four.

So some of you need to deal with your selfishness. And the only way to deal with your selfishness is to get honest. Hey man, I've made some selfish decisions.

And as a result of those selfish decisions, I'm increasing my selfishness. I am in trouble.

Let me just close with this. I do not have 20 minutes to tell my son-in-law Ryan's story. Many of you are familiar with it.

But there's a part of his story that is really interesting because not only was there failure and then great reclamation. I remember when he was engaged, my daughter, we had a very open conversation. I remember telling Ryan, you've got two major problems.

You've become very selfish and you've learned to be a good deceiver. Because of his The Cord app and his daily accountability, he was really confronting deceitfulness and just being honest every day about moral issues. And he was finding great liberty in that.

And I preached a whole message on the power of light. And so that's that point. But I remember, of course, I said, you've got to deal with selfishness.

You've got to be brutal with it. Well, about a year after the marriage, maybe a year and a half, my daughter was talking to my wife and she said something that I thought was stunning. She said, you know, Ryan is one of the most unselfish men I've ever seen in my life.

She said, I see, because Ryan is so unselfish, I see how selfish most men are. I never noticed that, but because of Ryan being so unselfish, I see how selfish many men are. You know what that did to my own heart?

It thrilled my heart. Ryan's not perfect, I'm not perfect, nobody is, but the point is he made a decision. You know what he made a decision?

I'm going to be brutal with selfishness. And you know where the very first step is to be brutal with selfishness? Is to get somebody and say, I've got to get honest, I've got a problem.

I think immoral thoughts. I look at garbage. I feed my flesh.

I am selfish to the core. I may be an awful husband and father, or I'm going to be an awful wife and mother. I've got to deal with this.

I don't care what it takes. I don't care how much difficulty it is. I don't care the embarrassment.

I've got to deal with this. And the sooner the better. And I'm just urging young people.

As I'm looking across this audience, you know what I'm sensing? God is on some of your front porch. You know what He's doing?

He's ringing the doorbell and says, you better listen to that guy. He's talking about you. You know why God does that?

Because He loves you. Now let me close with this and I'm done. Okay, just one thing.

Years ago, there were a couple of travelers. I don't remember where I heard this story, but they were in an Alpine situation. Now, Alpine situation would be like the Alps or the Canadian Rockies or somewhere up there.

It was wintertime and they were in a whiteout. Now, I'll be honest with you. I don't know that I've ever been in a whiteout.

I've been in blizzards, but not a whiteout. A whiteout when snow is so intense and the wind is so intense that you get disoriented and it's dangerous.

And the old plains there, Montana and North Dakotas and Nebraska, they would have whiteouts where a man would leave his farmhouse to go out to the barn, get disoriented, and they'd find him the next day dead and frozen because he couldn't find the house or the barn.

Now, I've never been in a storm of that kind of magnitude. But these two men were in a whiteout. They knew they were in trouble, and they were on a pathway.

They knew if they kept on the pathway, they'd get to a village and be rescued. If they left the pathway, they knew they'd die. So huddled together, freezing cold, they were moving toward that village when they came across a hump in the road.

Well, there's not rocks in the middle of pathways, so they knew something was wrong. And they began to dust it off, and they found a man freezing to death. The one man looked to him and said, listen, we've got to rescue this guy.

He's still alive. They'd taken his pulse. It was weak, but he was still alive.

He was clearly in the latter stages of hypothermia. The other guy said, no way, we can't rescue him. We rescue him, we're going to die.

He's going to die anyway. Let's just leave him here. We've got to rescue ourselves.

The other guy says, I can't leave him here. I've got to at least try. The other guy says, you want to try?

You try. I've got to save my own skin. Off he went.

The man finally put the man, arm here, leg here, began to carry him. It didn't take him very long to realize this was going to take an amazing amount of energy. He began to struggle and every step became painful.

His muscles screamed in rebellion. He was hoping to put the man down, but he knew he couldn't, and he knew he couldn't stop himself because he'd freeze. So just slowly, painstakingly, with great effort and great pain, he began to move along and he noticed something.

He was getting extremely warm. And he began to notice that he began to sweat. And he began to notice that the heat out of his own body was going into the guy who was dying of hypothermia, and he noticed that he began to warm up.

Pretty soon he realized he had a 98.6 degree Fahrenheit water bottle he was hanging on his back.

Well, he was struggling along, and he came almost to the village. He said, we're going to make it, we're going to make it. There was another hump on the road.

I thought, uh-oh, another traveler. He didn't know what to do. He thought, I better check on him.

So this time he didn't brush the snow off. He didn't have enough time. So he just went in, found his wrist, and ice cold.

Clearly he was dead. He thought, well, I've got to find out who he is. So he began to dust him off, see if he could find some ID.

And to his great horror, you know what he found? It was his fellow traveler.

The one who lived for himself froze to death. And the one who lived for another lived.

What a picture, friend. You live for yourself, and you'll be just like the book of Timothy. You'll be dead while you live.

You live in pleasure, you live for yourself, you will be dead. You'll be alive physically, you will be dead inside. Some of you are.

But if you live for others, Romans chapter 13 here talking about, you know what? Love's the fulfilling of the law. You will find the reality of God in your life.