Jim Van Gelderen: So we’re going to go to Hebrews chapter number 12, Hebrews chapter number 12. and we’ll dive right into the message here this morning. And what I want us to do here this morning is open our hearts and I’m going to make a statement and then after I make the statement we’ll get right into it.

If the Word of God is a mirror, Hebrews 12 is a full length mirror. The Bible tells us the Word of God is like a mirror and Hebrews 12 is me, one of the most stunning mirrors working with young people I’ve ever seen. Now I don’t know in your life if you’ve ever tried to navigate life without a mirror.

I remember years ago, Michael Schultz here, who works on the staff at Falls Baptist Church, came up to me. He was youth pastor at the time. And he said to me, Brother Van Gelder, he said, we’re going to go on a camping trip with the teenagers up to the Boundary Waters in the state of Minnesota.

How many know where that is? Boundary Waters. Okay, a few of you do.

There’s a series of lakes in northern Minnesota that go into Canada. And if you know what you’re doing, you can get in a canoe in the United States and you can canoe into Canada without going through customs. Isn’t that pretty cool?

And that means you don’t have to have a vaccination issue and et cetera. You can just sneak right in. Okay, now I’m just teasing with you.

Donald Trump didn’t build the wall up there yet. Okay, so there’s Surrey’s Lake. You can just sneak right in.

Okay, so it’s like remote wilderness is the idea. And the state bird is everywhere. And all you Minnesota people know what I’m talking about, the mosquito.

It’s everywhere up there in the boundary waters. And they’ll carry you away if you’re not careful. And so Brother Schultz said to me, Brother Van Gelden, would you come?

Now, I’m going to be dead honest with you. I don’t know if he’s in the room, but I don’t want him to feel bad about it. Oh, he is in the room.

Don’t want him to feel bad about this, but I don’t like camping. You know, I don’t like camping. I’m going to tell you why.

You know what my dad’s idea of camping was? Holiday Inn. That was my dad’s.

I have a camping trip. That was the Holiday Inn was a camping trip. Okay.

And so, well, Motel 6 would be a camping trip. But anyway, you know what I’m talking about. And so, when I grew up, we just didn’t go camping.

We just didn’t. I’m telling you. Now, my idea of camping is a 37-foot RV.

Okay. Fifth way was light outs. Okay.

That’s my And you know how it is. Every time I’ve ever gone camping, you start on a full air mattress, and by morning, you’re on the ground. You know what I’m talking about?

I don’t know why I always get the leaky air mattress. But anyway, and so I got ready to go on that thing. And I was excited about preaching to the young people.

Don’t get me wrong. But I was not looking forward to the camping part. But anyway, I remember going on that camping trip, and there was something I forgot I really regretted.

You know what I forgot? A mirror. Mirror, because pretty much, you know, go to the Holiday Inn, they got mirrors.

You know what I’m talking about? And no mirrors. Have you ever tried to comb your hair in the reflection of a lake?

I’m telling you, friends, it’s kind of tough. It really is. Now, some of you don’t comb your hair.

That’s pretty obvious. But anyway, but those of you that do comb your hair, I’m telling you, it’s kind of tough in the reflection of a lake. And I’m telling you, for about a week, I regretted not having that mirror.

I really did. Now, you know something about a mirror that’s really interesting? A mirror doesn’t solve your problem.

It just lets you know you got one. You know what I’m talking about? And some of you this morning, some of you girls, 530 in the morning, that alarm went off.

You stumbled down. You got your paint with you, your plaster of Paris. You had your toolkit, and you began reconstruction.

Now, don’t smile. It’s going to crack, okay? But anyway, and so there you are, and I’m telling you, ready to go.

What do you guys do? About 7.15, alarm rang. Rolled out of bed, came to breakfast.

Okay, we can tell. Okay, we’re not pointing any fingers, but we can tell. Okay, so what happens, girls?

You looked in the mirror, and you said, we got problems, right? And you began to work on things, and here you are, all nice and pretty right now. Okay, so you understand, we all understand what a mirror is.

You ever go on the restroom here? You know, when you’re going through your day, you go in the restroom and something’s hanging out of your nose. You know, life is over.

You know what I’m talking about? I cannot face, I can’t face anybody anymore. Okay, but you know, when a mirror can’t solve your problem, but it sure can let you know you’ve got one.

Okay, now, we all understand mirrors. But I want to tell you, the mirror of the Word of God is different. It not only tells you you’ve got a problem, it can fix it.

So let’s look at the mirror of God’s Word on the issue of bitterness. Now gang, I’ve done ministry now for 37 years, largely with young people. And some of you heard me say this, but I will tell you the number one problem I run across that young people struggle with is the issue of bitterness.

And I’m going to be honest with you, gang. I’m just going to be dead honest with you. Sometimes when I hear their stories, I think to myself, you know, maybe God, this could be an exception.

Maybe they could be bitter because they really have been through some tough things. So I’m not diminishing it, friends. And I’m not diminishing the fact that some of you have been through some very difficult things.

Can I tell you every time I hear Matthew Kelly’s testimony like he gave you, it’s honestly one of those kind of testimonies you think, how can you do that? How can you live with the fact that your dad leaves and he never comes back as he is taken to prison? That’s rough.

There are difficult things that some of you have gone through that maybe nobody knows about. Maybe some things behind closed doors that are difficult. I don’t know.

I really don’t know. But in a room this size, I would probably guess that over 50% of you have had some pretty tough things you’ve had to work through in life. And for some of you, perhaps more than we’d like to admit, you really have struggled with bitterness.

There’s been anger and hatred in your heart, or resentment in your heart, or blame in your heart towards someone who’s wronged you and thinking, man, they messed up my life. They ruined my life. Remember, blame really is bitterness.

Resentment is low-grade bitterness. It really is. And many times we kind of define it by different words.

But this passage of Scripture, if you are this morning struggling with bitterness, I want to tell you something. The Word of God this morning is going to be a full-length mirror, and it’s going to show you exactly what you look like. I’ve preached now in this passage of Scripture for years.

I’ve counseled it for years. I have never had a teenager who was bitter who ever said to me, Preacher, I’m bitter, but that’s not true in my life. Never had one.

You know why? Because it’s always been true. And if you’re bitter this morning, I’m going to show you exactly what God sees right now and exactly what’s going on in your life.

And perhaps there’ll be some light bulb moments to help you in this particular arena because you don’t have to walk out of this auditorium bitter. I’m telling you that Jesus can heal you. He really can.

and He can give you grace, that’s amazing. Let’s look, if you could, please, at verse 12. Let’s begin reading in verse number 14.

The Bible says, Friends, let’s just for a moment look at that first word there in that text of Scripture, the word follow. Follow. This word particularly follow is not talking about a casual pursuit.

It is talking about a relentless pursuit. Now I’ve got a time for honesty for all of us. How many of you every once in a while, for whatever reason, you watch some National Geographic video that shows big cats chasing down their prey?

Okay, how many are like that? Okay, yeah, I’ll admit it. Every once in a while, I’ll watch some lion or cheetah or whatever chase down that poor gazelle, you know what I’m talking about, and bring him down, and it’s lunch.

Okay, but anyway, there is something about a big cat chasing his prey, and it’s relentless. It’s a relentless pursuit. And there are many in the animal kingdom, many examples of a relentless pursuit.

Here’s what God says, I want you to relentlessly pursue peace with all men. I want to ask you a question, gang. Are you at peace with everybody that you know of on planet Earth?

Are you at peace with anybody? Is there anybody you’re not at peace with. Now remember this.

The Bible doesn’t say that they have to be at peace with you. You can’t control whether someone’s at peace with you. But you sure can control whether you’re at peace with them.

So I want to ask you, are you at peace with your mother? Are you at peace with your father? Are you at peace with your brothers and sisters?

Are you at peace with other relatives? Are you at peace with your friends? Is there anybody you’re right now thinking of that you’re not at peace with?

As soon as their name is mentioned, there’s a rise in your heart. There’s anger that fills your heart. You say, man, they messed up everything.

They ruined this, whatever it might be. God says you need to be relentless in your pursuit of being at peace with all men and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord. And what God is simply saying is this, you cannot have an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ as long as there is unholy attitude in your heart.

As long as there’s resentment, as long as there’s blame, as long as there’s anger or even hatred in your heart toward anybody, you cannot, you cannot see God. You cannot know the reality of His presence in your life. Okay, so God’s starting off and saying, listen, you need to be at peace with everybody.

You need to pursue it. You need to be relentless about it. There shouldn’t be anybody on planet Earth, dead or alive.

Yes, you can hate dead people. I mean, there should be nobody on planet Earth, dead or alive, that you have anger, resentment, and bitterness in your heart toward. Then He says in verse number 15 He uses a participle, which comes off the main verb, follow peace, looking diligently.

And after that, looking diligently. God says, I want you to be diligent about it. Can you get the idea of the urgency God’s trying to impress upon our hearts?

You can’t let the bitterness fester. You can’t let it stay there. You can’t let the sun go down upon your wrath.

You’ll give place to the devil. God is encouraging us on this important matter. And then he says three times the word, lest.

Looking diligently, lest. Lest. Lest.

Now these are basically markers and what God is simply saying is, you need to pursue peace with everybody. You need to be diligent about it because if you don’t, this is going to happen. And if this is going to happen, then this is going to happen.

And if this happens, then this is going to happen. It’s what I’m going to call, the message is going to be called the backsliding of bitterness. The backsliding of bitterness.

In other words, friends, if this happens, then this is going to happen. If this happens, then this is going to happen. It’s a downward spiral.

But notice, if you would please, the very first one there in verse number 15. Looking diligently, lest any man fail of the grace of God. Now, I’m going to just simply say this, friends.

The grace of God will never fail you. but you can fail the grace of God. Now how do you fail the grace of God?

Well let’s first of all, what is the grace of God? Well if you know anything about the grace of God, grace is one of those words that many times if you grow up in church you hear it but don’t understand it. It’s such a simple word but you know what it means?

It means it’s a gift from God. Grace can’t be earned, it can’t be worked for, it can’t be performed for, it cannot be bought. The only way to get grace is to receive it, is to take it because it’s a gift.

If you work for it, it’s not grace. If you buy it, it’s not grace. If you perform for it, it’s not grace.

Grace is completely unmerited. In other words, it is that which is simply given to you as a gift from God. Now, don’t get me wrong.

God gives us tangible things. I have parked down in South Carolina now, one of my trucks, and in 2005, I can’t explain it right now, but God gave me that truck. And I’m going to tell you, it’s a gift from God.

I can explain it, and you’d hear, yeah, that was a gift from God. God gave you that truck. But I’m going to tell you, friends, that’s not primarily the emphasis of grace.

Certainly God gives us tangible things, give us this day our daily bread. But really the emphasis of grace is that which is spiritual. Okay, so you know what grace is?

How about this one? Unspeakable joy. I mean, I’ve heard teenagers give testimony at the end of a special forces week and talk about getting right with God and dealing with this or that, and look with a big smile on their face and say, I have joy in my heart now.

Do you know what that is? That’s grace. Do you know what grace is?

It’s peace that passes understanding. It’s when the man, your life may be all just haywire, but there’s a peace in your heart that passes understanding. I’ll tell you, young person, many of you are too young to have had this happen yet, but one day you’re going to walk by a casket and say goodbye to some of the most precious people on planet Earth you know.

And all I can tell you is when you’re being graced and accepting that grace, there’s peace that passes understanding. I don’t understand it. I can’t explain it.

But to walk by and say goodbye in a certain sense that God gives you peace in your heart. I’ve seen people go absolutely frantic and berserk when they have to say goodbye to somebody. But I’m telling you, God’s people don’t have to do that.

You know why? Because of grace. Grace is peace that passes understanding.

I can’t explain it to you because you can’t explain it. It’s peace that passes understanding. Yeah, I’m talking about fulfillment.

I’m talking about waking up in the morning and looking toward heaven and saying, man, God, I love life. Some of you don’t love life. But I’m going to tell you, if you get a hold of grace, you’re going to start loving life.

You’re going to think, man, I wonder what God’s going to do today. You know what grace is? It’s supernatural strength to God to give you victory you never thought possible.

I’m telling you, grace is strength. It’s fulfillment. It’s joy.

It’s peace. It’s long-suffering. It’s being patient with people who are very irritating.

That’s grace. It’s loving people that aren’t easy to love. I’m telling you, friends, that’s grace.

I absolutely love special forces, and some of you, our young people are here, and many weeks, I come into a week, I say, okay, God, I’m gonna volunteer. Would you love these kids through me? And I will tell you, young people, I am telling you, God can grace you with love you never thought possible, and I’m telling you, God can give you love for unlovable people, and some of you live in homes with unlovable people.

I got really good news for you. God has grace available. Now, the wonderful thing about grace, the Bible says, my grace is sufficient for thee.

I like one author put it this way. God’s grace is more than enough. It’s more than enough.

Do you know you’ll never run out of grace? There’s never grace that is not available. God always has enough grace, more than you’ll need for every situation.

Now, the thing, if we could use the analogy, grace, if I could put it, is like I mentioned a gift. It’s like a present. But you know what a present has to be done?

It has to be unwrapped. You see, you have to, how do I say this? Not fail the grace of God.

When you fail the grace of God, it stays wrapped up. When you access the grace of God, you have opened the grace. Have you ever noticed that any present you’ve ever gotten does you no good until you unwrap it and open it?

Now, this is a crazy illustration, but let’s imagine I was back in your home area, and maybe you invited me to your house. I don’t know. Maybe you see your baseball card collection or see your pet iguana or whatever.

I don’t know. And I come over to your house, and I walk through the door, walk into the living room, and there it is, a huge stack of presents in the corner. Now, they’re clearly Christmas presents because you know what I’m talking about.

You can tell Christmas wrapping paper has wreaths, has bells, has angels, candles, the big fat guy in the red suit. You know what I’m talking about. Has big Rudolph with his big red schnoz.

You know what I’m talking about. These are clearly, clearly Christmas presents. Now, I’m a little puzzled.

I’m looking at the calendar. It’s October. I’m thinking, man, who knows?

I mean, the woman in this house must be Martha Stewart on steroids minus prison. I’m telling you, I’m telling you who it could, unbelievable. And so I’m walking in here, I’m thinking, man, what’s going on?

So I look at you and I point to the presents. I said, what’s that? Oh, you laugh a little bit.

Say, those are presents from last year. We’ll get around to opening them sooner or later. Now, would you find that to be a little odd?

Well, I’m telling you, if there’s teenagers in the house, probably not existed. You know why? Because those presents won’t be doing you any good all wrapped up.

You could have a brand new smartphone, and I’m telling you, friends, in October, it ain’t doing you any good, okay? Not at all, because it’s still wrapped up. Plus the fact, if it was given to you in December, the thing’s a dinosaur.

I mean, completely out. You know what I’m talking about? It’s out of there.

Okay, you know, what do you have to do to make those gifts something that advantage your life? It’s real simple. You just got to open them.

You can have a Dunkin’ Donuts gift card not doing you any good, right? Of course, if you had a Starbucks gift card, it wouldn’t be doing you good, but that’s no big deal. But anyway, if you had a Dunkin’ Donuts gift card not doing you any good, what are you going to do?

You got to open it up. Okay, we all get that. Everybody gets this.

Now, here’s the point. God, every day of your Christian life, He gives you gifts. Do you know what I find with most Christians?

They don’t open them. They live like paupers when they’re surrounded by some of the most extravagant gifts you could ever be given in the entire universe. They’re spiritual realities.

And they don’t open them. God is simply saying, friends, it’s like this. If you access the grace of God, it is impossible to get better.

The only way you can get better is to leave the grace of God wrapped up. Well, you say, preacher, how do you open the grace of God? I mean, how do you open something you can’t see?

Well, that’s a really good question. So let’s ask ourselves, how do we open the very first gift God gave us? And that was the gift of eternal life.

For by grace, there’s our word, are you saved, help me out now, through faith. One day as a hell-bound sinner, what did you do? You trusted Jesus to do for you what you could not do for yourself.

You couldn’t wash your sins away. You couldn’t keep yourself out of hell. You certainly couldn’t give yourself eternal life in heaven.

But you trusted Jesus to do what you could not do and He gave you eternal life. He graced you. Why?

Because you believed Him. You depended on Him. You trusted Him.

You expected Him to do what He said He would do. Okay, that’s faith. Now, don’t miss this.

Bad things come into all of our lives. People will say something hurtful. People will do something tough.

People sometimes maybe neglect or maybe break a promise or maybe knife you in the back. All kinds of things happen in life that are tough. Maybe like Matthew testified, a dad walks out of the home and not involved in your life like he used to be or maybe never was.

I don’t know. Difficult things. I’m telling you, friends, these are difficult things.

Maybe you have a step-parent equation and it’s just rough. You don’t want to get along with that step-parent. There’s a problem.

I’m telling you all kinds of things. I don’t know all your backgrounds, but a lot of stories are in this auditorium, all kinds of stories in this auditorium. But I’m telling you this, when difficult things happen, when somebody wrongs you, when something happens that’s tough, you’re in a crisis.

Because either you’re going to say, That stinks. That rots. Why’d my dad do this?

Why’d my mom have to say that? Why’d that person do that? Makes me so mad.

And I will tell you, you know what will happen? Don’t miss this spiritually. Nothing.

You know why? Because that’s unbelief. Don’t miss this.

If you access grace by believing God, you fail grace by not believing God. And I’m going to simply say, friends, when we are wronged and we’re in a crisis and we’ve been hurt and there’s difficulty, We are at a crisis because either we’re going to say, that stinks, that rots, makes me so mad. Why’d that person do that?

Why does that have to happen? And fail grace. Or we’ll say, God, this really hurt.

That was tough. Okay, God, I’m trusting you to work it together for good. And you begin to depend upon the character of God.

You begin to depend upon the promises of God. And guess what happens? We’ll talk about this at the end of the message.

You open grace. But right now we’re on the negative side. So the first thing that has to happen is you have to fail the grace of God.

And you fail God’s grace by unbelief. That rots, that stinks, why’d that happen? Okay, number two.

God says as soon as you fail the grace of God, here’s something that next thing happens. Last, any root of bitterness bringing up trouble you. Thereby many be defiled.

I’m going to promise you I don’t care who you are. I don’t care if you’re a staff member here or if you’re, it doesn’t matter who you are, myself included. I have learned this in life.

It doesn’t matter what position you have. If you fail grace, guess what happens? Bitterness springs up and you’re troubled.

Bitter people are troubled people. Every bitter teenager in this room is troubled. You don’t like life.

You’re ticked off. That stinks. Why’d that have to happen?

I’m telling you, there’s some people that I don’t know how to explain it, but every single time you’re around them, you can tell they’re not happy with life. How do I say this? A perpetual Eeyore.

You know what I’m talking about? I mean just always, it’s just, it’s all bad. It’s raining all the time.

And you know why? Because bitter people are troubled people. But the wicked are like the troubled sea when it cannot rest.

Whose waters cast up mire and dirt there is no peace, saith my God to the wicked. Did you know, friend, God is simply saying bitter people are like the troubled sea when it cannot rest. Like a hurricane going over waters and it’s casting up the dirt off the bottom of the ocean, so it’s just completely murky underneath.

That’s the picture of many people’s hearts. They’re troubled. And I’m talking to some dear teenagers.

You’re not happy with life. You’re troubled. In a moment, you’re going to see what happens.

Not only are you troubled, but the next part of it says, root of bitterness springing up troubles us and thereby, don’t miss this, many be defiled. A bitter teenager, mark this out, friends, and a bitter adult for that matter, defiles many. Do you know what I find about bitter people?

They’re hypocrites. I’m talking to some of you. I’m not trying to be unkind.

I’m trying to help you. You’re all bitter. Why’d that person say that?

Why’d that person do that? Why’d that have to happen? And then they turn around and treat younger brothers and sisters like dirt.

Does that sound like a hypocrite to you? Because it does to me. If you’re upset somebody mistreated you and you turn around and mistreat others, that sounds like hypocrisy to me.

But that’s what bitter people do. They do. So I’m talking to some of you.

I’m not trying to be unkind, that you treat younger brothers and sisters like total trash. I’m talking to some of you, treat your mom like trash. I’m going to tell you, if you want to irk somebody, I’m telling you, friends, anybody in here who grew up in a home where you’re just thankful for your mother, I’m telling you, when you just turned 7th grade and you think you’re not big enough to treat your mom like trash, you’ve got a problem.

The woman that risked her life to bring you in the world, you treat her like trash, you ought to go home and ask her forgiveness. I’m telling you. It’s amazing to me.

I remember I was in West Columbia, South Carolina. A kid came to the microphone. The kid was sobbing.

His dad walked out of his life, walked out of the home. And his mom, of course, was there and had to now take a full-time job and hours away just to put food on the table. And he was broken.

You know what he’s broken about? The fact he got bitter. And you know what he did?

He took it out on his mom. He didn’t take it out on his dad. He took it out on his mom.

That didn’t make sense to me. She’s the one that’s staying. She’s the one who’s working hours to put food on the table.

And yet he took it out on his mom. and he got broken that day. And I remember he sobbed a public confession to his mother in that room, asking her to forgive him for his bitterness toward her.

But you know, that’s what bitterness does. It doesn’t make any sense. You treat others like trash.

Some of you treat your parents like trash. Now, unfortunately, in our day, parents let kids get away with it. I never treated my dad like trash.

And if you lived in my home, you wouldn’t either. You say, oh, boy, you must have had an abusive father. No, I had a father who I know loved me, but because he loved me, he did not let me get away with disrespect.

at all. But the point is, friends, for some of you in this room, you understand, bitterness causes you to defile others. Some of you have heard me say this before, but I must say it for those that do, and I’ve never heard it said.

I’m going to tell you, friends, you know what a bitterness does? You know what a bitter teenager becomes? An angry parent.

Do you know what an angry parent produces? Bitter teenagers. Do you know what a bitter teenager becomes?

An angry parent. Do you know what an angry parent produces? Bitter teenagers.

Do you know what Now the only thing that can stop that friend, and it can, is the grace of God. I remember years ago, I had a young lady come up to me after chapel in South Carolina. She said, Brother Van Gelderen, she said, I’m adopted.

She said, my mother who adopted me has said to me on several occasions, I wish I had never adopted you. Let me just stop and say, I don’t know all the details in that home, but I’m going to tell you that, that’s rough. That’s really rough.

She was very cavalier in her attitude. She was acting like it was no big deal. And I knew that was a defense mechanism, deeply down, it deeply hurt her, but she was acting like it didn’t.

And I stopped and I said, well, young lady, I said, you are in a crisis, aren’t you? I said, you got two choices. Number one, you can get bitter at your mom who adopted you.

And one day you will do the very same thing to your own children. I said, or you can access the grace of God and stop the mess. But I said, it’s your choice.

See, friends, bitterness defiles others. That’s what it did. Obviously, her mother was bitter.

Her adopted mother was bitter, and now her bitterness was defiling her young people. Listen, friends, some of you need to recognize that one of the reasons you feel provoked to bitterness by a mother or a father is because they’ve never dealt with their bitterness. And they’re frustrated and angry with life.

They don’t like it. And you need to recognize, it’s like this. Bitterness turns you into the very person you’re bitter at.

How many times have I heard people say, I’ll never be like my father. I’ll never be like my mother. I’m telling you, friends, I’ve been in ministry long enough to know.

There’s sometimes I’ve been in situations that I just wanted to cry. I just remember a few months ago sitting across the table of a gentleman who’s in his 50s. He’s probably five, six years younger than I am.

I know a little bit about his background. His father left and made a lot of promises that he never kept. I don’t think one time he kept any promise.

He made multiple promises, never kept one. That man in his 50s looked across the table at me and said, Brother Van Gelderen, he said, when I was growing up, I said to myself multiple times, I will never be like my father. And he says, Brother Van Gelderen, I hate to tell you this, but I’ve been just like him.

Bitterness will turn you into the very person you’re bitter at. I remember years ago reading the book, I think it was Choosing Forgiveness by Nancy Lee DeMoss, And in the particular book at the time, she wrote about a young mother who had an infant and something happened with an infant. Now, if you have younger brothers and sisters and infants, something’s always happening.

Can I just say it as carefully as I know how? Something’s coming out of one end or the other. Okay, we’ll just leave it at that.

And something was happening with the infant and she exploded in anger. And an infant. And when she did, she said, I’m becoming my mother.

The very woman I said I will never be like. See, that’s the tragedy of bitterness. See, it troubles you and it defiles many.

That brings us to a third step. It then says, lest any fornicator, let me read the exact words here in verse 17, verse 16, lest there be any fornicator, there it is, or profane person as Esau. So the next thing that happens is you open the door to two kinds of tragic ends.

Number one, you become a fornicator. Number two, you become a profane person. If you’ll notice in the text of Scripture there, the little word or.

It’s one or the other. Rarely have I seen it to be both. Now, I think sometimes it can be one and then switch to another, but the little word or seems to be very interesting there, and certainly I’ve seen this.

But bitterness opens, first of all, to the tragedy of becoming a fornicator. The word fornication is the Greek word pornos. There’s two major definitions of the Greek word pornos.

One would be it’s somebody involved in premarital sexual activity. Most of the time in the Bible, that’s what we think of with the word fornication or fornicator. But there’s also a second definition, which is a broader word, basically talking about all of the moral impurity the world has out there, all the junk, all the filth, all the uncleanness.

And obviously, the second definition is in view here. So in other words, bitterness opens the door to moral impurity. I’m not trying to be in kind, but there are some young men in this room who struggle on a regular basis with the pornography.

And I’m gonna tell you right now, the reason you struggle with pornography is simply this. You’re bitter. You’re bitter.

You don’t see the connection, but bitterness opens the door to moral filth. It really does. In fact, all across this community, our young people that are living together, not married, and I guarantee you, in many of those cases, you know why?

They’re bitter. See, many times young men, they want to get victory over looking at filth, but they don’t realize that without getting rid of bitterness, they’ll never get to full victory. Now, I’m not, and Nancy Lee DeMoss in her book, Choosing Forgiveness, says she believes that everybody in sexual sin or moral impurity is bitter.

Everybody. Now, I’m not sure I can be that dogmatic because I don’t see it in the Bible, but I will tell you this. I think a lot of people in moral impurity are bitter.

And I’m talking to some of you guys, and girls even, that have a garbage pit for a brain. Maybe some of you girls have gotten into reading garbage, reading romance novels that are nothing more than pornography in print. I don’t know what your issue is, but I’m going to tell you that many times moral impurity comes out of a bitter heart.

It opens the door to moral impurity. I remember years ago, counseling, or actually having a young lady give a testimony, and I was stunned by the testimony, but it fits the passage. She talked about the fact that when she was younger, she said she kind of was oblivious to her parents’ bad marriage.

But she said, at 12 years old, I realized something I’d never realized before. My parents’ marriage wasn’t just bad, it stunk. She said, at 12 years old, I became very bitter.

She said, the reason I became bitter is because when we went to church, everybody thought we were the model family. But when the door was closed, my parents fought like cats and dogs. She said, as a result of my bitterness, I didn’t realize it at the time what happened.

she said, I began to have a thirst for filth. She said, I’d go to the library, try to find the dirtiest stuff I could find. She said, I’d babysit.

This is, of course, dated. This is years ago. I’d babysit, put the kids down, get out the remote, turn on the television, try to find the filthiest stuff I could find.

She said, I saw no connection between the two until at 16 years old I was at summer camp, heard preaching and got broken with God about my bitterness. She said, I got right with God about my bitterness. And she said, when I did, My thirst for filth was gone.

You see, you in person, God is trying to help us understand that bitterness opens the door to moral impurity. That’s what it does. Remember that girl a moment ago who was adopted?

Mother said, I wish I’d never adopted you. Later in the week, she was counseling with my wife and she admitted to my wife she had an unsaved boyfriend and already had been involved in sexual sin. And I’ll be honest with you.

When my wife told me I was grieved and I was burdened, but you hear me, I was not shocked at all. because that’s what bitterness does. And I’m talking to some of you who got big problems in the moral arena.

And I’m trying to help you. You’ve got to, in order to get victory, you’ve got to start with the root issue. And your root problem is bitterness in many cases.

I believe there are other root issues, but this is a big one. Bitterness, it opens the door to moral filth. Now that brings us to a second thing.

It says, or profane person. You say, what in the world does that mean? Well, the word profane, we have a word we use that we know, profanity.

Do you know what the word profane means? Don’t miss this. It means common.

You say common? How do you get profanity from common? That’s real easy.

You know what profanity is? It’s taking the name of a high, holy, exalted, great God and treating Him like He is common. I’m telling you, many of us in this room use profanity every day and don’t even know it.

You know why? We have no respect for the name of God. Obviously, if you text OMG, you are profane.

I’m telling you, friends, when you say, oh, my, G-O-D, and you use God’s name as a flippant, just euphemism, I’m telling you right now, that’s profanity. It’s taking the name of God and using it, though it’s just common. And we all get profanity.

I think we understand that. But what’s a profane person? Can I say this carefully?

A profane person is a teenager who’s got an attitude toward God. You’ve got some attitude. You might be angry at God.

You might even say that you hate God. Oh, I’ve had young people tell me, I hated God, I hated God. I tell young people all the time, God’s not your problem, He’s your solution.

God never caused a lick of your problem, but I’m telling you, He’s the solution. I’ve seen profane people. I remember years ago, I called in to counsel some emo girl who tried to commit suicide.

I sat down, she had all the black accent, all that stuff. She was not a believer. I did everything I could to try to present the claims of Jesus Christ.

And finally, as I left, I said, one day you’re going to come to the bottom. And I said, I am pleading with you. God is not your problem.

He is your solution. Turn to Him, and my young lady, He’ll wash your sins away and save your soul. How sad I was about nine months later, he or she committed suicide and went to hell.

My friend, she believed the lie that God was her problem. You hear me, I don’t care who you are. God has never been your problem.

He’s your solution. The devil is your problem. He’s a liar, and he wants to put your problems God when they’re really His fault.

And I’m telling you, friends, bitterness means you believe the lie of the destroyer, the murderer, the liar. You have believed his lie. Don’t go that white route.

You see, a profane person blames God. He has an attitude toward God. He’s angry at God.

He hates God. I remember years ago I was preaching in a youth group and I finished preaching and a young lady came up to me. She was livid.

She said, it’s not true. It’s not true. I said, what do you mean it’s not true?

She quoted a verse I’d been preaching on out of the book of Proverbs. She said, it’s not true. Now, I’m just going to tell you young people, I know you look up here and you see this guy preaching, you’re thinking, man, you’re old.

It’s true, I am old. But I’m going to promise you this, I’m old, but I’m just going to promise you I’m not old enough to have written the Bible. I’m not old enough to have done that.

And she’s coming at me, it’s not true, it’s not true. It’s like, well, I didn’t write it, okay, you know, I’m not the problem. And she’s all worked up, and man, we got an animated conversation.

Later in the conversation, I just looked at her, I said, young lady, I said, you know what your problem is? no, what? I said, you hate God.

And I’ll never forget her answer. Those cold blue eyes, she looked at me and she said, you’re right. I happen to know something about her home disaster.

She was bitter. Remember a husband and wife said, can you talk to our college age daughter? I came over to the house, they were seated at the table, the dinner table.

She was seated. I opened the Bible, went through Hebrews 12 and I was done. She said, Brother Vangelo, she said, that’s it.

I’ve been so angry at God.

some of you aren’t into moral impurity but you got an attitude toward God you know what it is I don’t want to go to church if you’re in Christian school Bible class why do we have to memorize this stuff why do we have to read the Bible you see you know I’m talking about you’re profane you treat something eternal something valuable something spiritual though it’s common now it’s interesting in this particular verse God gives us a person who is profane he does it with the fornicator

because that one’s pretty obvious the Bible’s full of examples that could have been used. But a profane person, God wants to get what a profane person is. So he gave us an example from the Old Testament.

Anybody know who the example is? It was Esau. So what did Esau do?

Well, it’s real simple. Esau traded his birthright. In other words, through Esau was going to come the Messiah.

He traded something that was eternal, that was spiritual, that was valuable, and he traded it, anybody know, for a bowl of soup. Say, preacher, nobody does that anymore. You want to make a bet?

Yeah. How many people stay home on Sunday night on Super Bowl Sunday? Stay home from church to watch the Super Bowl.

See, they may not be trading something eternal, spiritual, valuable for a bowl of soup. They’re trading it for the Super Bowl. Did you get it?

Okay, there it is. It’s our modern day Esau’s. Somebody ought to preach on Super Bowl Sunday morning.

Ought to preach a message on, are you going to be an Esau tonight? That would be a great message. That’d be a great message.

I remember years ago, the Chicago Bears were playing on a night game on a Sunday night. I think it was, it might have been the Super Bowl. I think it might have been.

Of course, that would have been 1986 because that’s about the only time they were in the Super Bowl. But anyway, and my dad got up at the Marquette Manor Baptist Church with a big smile on his face. He said, tonight, I’m so excited about tonight.

Of course, Super Bowl was going to run right during church. He said, tonight, I get to see how many of my people love Jesus and how many of my people are more excited about Jesus than anything else. I can’t wait till tonight.

Said nothing about the game. That night the place was packed. Okay, anyway.

Okay, my dad had a way of filling the auditorium on Super Bowl Sunday night. Okay, but here’s the point, friends. We all know Esau had an attitude toward God.

He didn’t value God. And some of you in this room don’t either. You don’t value spending time with God.

You don’t value the Bible. You don’t value church. You don’t value youth group.

That’s what happens to profane people. They get an attitude toward God. You say, okay preacher, I’ve seen myself in the full length mirror and I’m not liking what I’m seeing.

Well I’ve got really good news for you. There’s an answer here. There is an answer.

Now I don’t know how to say this in a politically correct fashion. I’m afraid it’s just not going to be politically correct. But my apologies really if this offends you.

I’m not trying to offend you. But I’m going to use an analogy. God is not an Indian giver.

You with me on that? When God gave you that grace, it’s still there.

it’s still waiting to be opened so you say preacher what are you saying i’m simply saying if you’re bitter and you see yourself in the mirror you need to go back to that very moment where you failed grace and said oh god god i was wrong for failing your grace i was wrong for not trusting you i was wrong for not believing and though god i can’t see it i want to know tell you right now i’m trusting you take all these bad things i’ve been

bitter about and all these things people have done wrong, and I’m trusting you to work them together for good. Now don’t get me wrong, friends. When people sin and it ill affects our life, God has nothing to do with sinful choices.

Did you know that? The Bible says He doesn’t tempt us with evil. But you’re not a robot, and I am not either.

Which means you and I can make sinful choices. Have you ever noticed that when you make sinful choices God doesn’t stop you? And sometimes we get, why did that person and say that, and we blame God for other people’s sin.

Remember this, friends. When God set it up, He made you with a person of free will. He does not violate your free will.

And when people make sinful choices, guess what? It hurts innocent bystanders. And some of you have been hurt by other people.

I’m not trying to be in kind. I’m not trying to throw your dad into the bus. But if your dad looks at pornography, he has brought difficulty into your home by his sinful choice.

You may not even know he’s looking in pornography, but I guarantee you this, if he is, there’s fallout to innocent bystanders. That’s just the way it is, and that’s why, young man, if you’ve got a pornography problem, you better deal with it, or I’m telling you, it’s the most selfish thing you can look at, because one day you’re going to not just hurt your wife, you’re going to hurt your kids. It’s a big deal.

I preached on that a year ago, so I won’t re-preach the message, but you can go back and listen to it, co-infections, a moral impurity, if you think you need it, and I hope it would be a help to you. But all of us understand that God’s grace is still there. And God’s just waiting for you to go back and say, okay, God, all these difficult things have happened.

People have made sinful choices around me that have ill-affected my life. But God, I believe you’re so great. You’re so big.

You’re so in control that you can take other people’s sinful choices, work them into my life to accomplish the will of God without having anything to do with their sinful choices. Now that’s an amazing God. And that’s exactly what Joseph said when he said to the brothers sold him to slavery, and caused him 13 years of prison and slavery.

I can guarantee you that 13 years of slavery and prison didn’t look pretty. But Joseph looked him in the eye and says, you meant it for evil. But God meant it unto good to save much people alive as it is this day.

It’s the Romans 8.28 of the Old Testament. You guys meant it for evil, but hallelujah, God meant it for good. And I will tell you friends, somewhere along the line, Joseph made a decision.

And he made a decision not to get bitter to his brothers, but to trust God to work it together for good. And I’m begging every single one of you in this room that has that anger and that resentment, man, my mom, why’d she do that? My dad, why’d he leave?

Why’d that have to happen? Why does my dad have an anger problem? Why did he say that?

Whatever it might be, my burden for each one of you is to simply bow your head to heart in just a moment and say, okay, God, these are tough things, but God, I’m trusting you to work them together for good. Well, you say, preacher, when I get home, it’s going to happen again. Well, I got really good news for you.

There will be more grace than you need at that point. There’ll be a new crisis, but at that crisis, you can say, okay, God, before I’ve gotten better, but I’m taking the grace. And I’m telling you, friends, people will notice a difference in your life.

They realize you’re not angry anymore. You’re trusting God to take bad things and work them together for good. I remember I was seated on the front row at a Christian school in Jacksonville, Florida.

A young man named Jason sitting next to me, he said, my dad did this, my brother did this man he had a long list usually bitter people have a long list then I said to him Jason you’re willing to take all those bad things that have happened to you trust God to work them together for good he said yeah I said okay he bowed his head and he prayed he prayed a long time you know what I’ve learned if people have a long list it might

take them a while okay he prayed a long time when he looked up he was smiling he said man I feel better I said Jason that is grace I was in a large Christian school in the state of Florida I remember it was the week went on. I had different ones telling me, yeah, there’s a girl in the school. She parties.

She’s trying to get other kids to go out and party. And I know I didn’t ask who she was. I wasn’t really interested in who she was.

I didn’t want to affect my interaction with people. And so I just noted it, put in the back of my brain. Time went on about Thursday.

Vice principal came up to me with a young lady and said, brother, would you talk to this girl? Remember when it was an auditorium where people were coming and going, so it was appropriate setting. She sat down one pew.

I sat down another. I said, okay, what’s up? She said, my dad’s out of here.

Hadn’t been around for a long time. My mom kicked me out of the house. I’m living at so-and-so’s house.

And she was bitter. Very first thing we had to deal with was assurance of salvation. She wasn’t sure he was saved.

We worked through that. And then we started on the other. I said, okay, you willing, all these bad things that have happened, you willing to trust God, take them all, work them together for good?

She said, yeah. I said, okay, tell God. She bowed her head.

She prayed. It was, again, a longer prayer. When she was done, she looked up.

Her countenance was changed. She had a smile on her face. She said, man, I feel better.

I said, young lady, I said, that’s grace. And I’m telling you, I don’t know how to explain grace. That’s the teenage way of saying, I just got graced.

I just opened grace. And I’m telling you, friends, you say, well, preacher, I’m going to open grace in that struggle again. Listen, like I said, every new crisis, there’ll be more than enough grace.

God will help you every time. You know what that’s called? Renewing your mind, where you begin to react differently when you’re wronged, trusting God to give you the grace to overcome that particular situation.

Instead of reacting, you open, you receive grace and allow God to change you. I’m telling you, friend, that’s how you live the Christian life. So it was simply the backsliding of it.